1. In your face
    Joined
    21 Aug '04
    Moves
    55993
    22 Nov '14 14:38
    ...by none other than someone from the Office of National Statistics.

    I first got a letter about three weeks ago telling me how important that it was that I let them interview me to find out some data. If I didn't do this then it could throw the whole thing out of balance because the addresses are specially selected. Bloody statistics! She has been constantly ringing my bell and putting notes through my door. Today she was waiting outside my house in her car and when I returned from the shops she started knocking on again. i eventually lost it and told her to stop stalking me.

    Aaaargh leave me alone!
  2. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    22 Nov '14 15:14
    That's nothing.

    When my ex divorced me for slapping her after discovering
    she was born a man, I got the LGBT community picketing
    my workplace during the day and throwing eggs and tomatoes
    at my door in the middle of the night.

    This lasted for 6 months.
  3. Subscriberrookie54
    free tazer tickles..
    wildly content...
    Joined
    09 Mar '08
    Moves
    200687
    22 Nov '14 15:34
    Originally posted by Seitse
    in the middle of the night for 6 months.
    i hate it when the night lasts for six months...
  4. In your face
    Joined
    21 Aug '04
    Moves
    55993
    22 Nov '14 15:35
    Prove it!
  5. Joined
    14 Mar '04
    Moves
    173583
    22 Nov '14 15:38
    Originally posted by Sicilian Sausage
    ...by none other than someone from the Office of National Statistics.

    I first got a letter about three weeks ago telling me how important that it was that I let them interview me to find out some data. If I didn't do this then it could throw the whole thing out of balance because the addresses are specially selected. Bloody statistics! She has be ...[text shortened]... ing on again. i eventually lost it and told her to stop stalking me.

    Aaaargh leave me alone!
    Give her what she wants and be done with it...Oh wait, what does she look like?
  6. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    22 Nov '14 15:52
    Originally posted by Great Big Stees
    Give her what she wants and be done with it...Oh wait, what does she look like?
    What if she wants the D and the charcuterie from Sicily
    doesn't dig seafood?
  7. In your face
    Joined
    21 Aug '04
    Moves
    55993
    22 Nov '14 15:52
    Originally posted by Great Big Stees
    Give her what she wants and be done with it...Oh wait, what does she look like?
    I'm not sure they inclube nob size in national statistics but you never know!
  8. SubscriberPonderable
    chemist
    Linkenheim
    Joined
    22 Apr '05
    Moves
    653693
    22 Nov '14 15:53
    Originally posted by rookie54
    i hate it when the night lasts for six months...
    was it at North or South pole?
  9. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    22 Nov '14 15:57
    Originally posted by Sicilian Sausage
    Prove it!
    I just PM'd you a pic of my ex. With a bloody mustache.
  10. In your face
    Joined
    21 Aug '04
    Moves
    55993
    22 Nov '14 15:59
    Originally posted by Seitse
    I just PM'd you a pic of my ex. With a bloody mustache.
    Strange place to have a moustache!
  11. Standard memberredbadger
    Suzzie says Badger
    is Racist Bastard
    Joined
    09 Jun '14
    Moves
    10079
    22 Nov '14 16:03
    Originally posted by Seitse
    That's nothing.

    When my ex divorced me for slapping her after discovering
    she was born a man, I got the LGBT community picketing
    my workplace during the day and throwing eggs and tomatoes
    at my door in the middle of the night.

    This lasted for 6 months.
    I was born a Lesbian in a male body.
  12. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    22 Nov '14 16:04
    Originally posted by Sicilian Sausage
    Strange place to have a moustache!
    Ever heard about the Half Brazilian waxing?
  13. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    22 Nov '14 16:07
    Originally posted by rookie54
    i hate it when the night lasts for six months...
    That's how we roll up here in the North, yo
  14. SubscriberDrewnogal
    Constant Gardener
    The Plot
    Joined
    07 Aug '12
    Moves
    51487
    22 Nov '14 17:32

    This post is unavailable.

    Please refer to our posting guidelines.

  15. Standard memberCalJust
    It is what it is
    Pretoria
    Joined
    20 Apr '04
    Moves
    66380
    22 Nov '14 17:541 edit
    We had a census in South Africa recently. That reminded me of the story of the census taker visiting a house when a woman answered the door.

    Woman:"What do you want?"

    Census taker: "Lady, we are trying to find out how many are people living in this country."

    Woman: "Well, there is no point in asking me! I have no idea!"
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