Colonoscopy Spa // marketing survey

Good day, nerds. I am here representing a very
ambitious new startup UpTheSpa™ and
I would be very grateful if you could answer the
following questions --which will ultimately help
our world class marketing team to tailor for you
the ultimate experience.

All respondents will receive for their troubles a
€100 voucher to be used in the standard menu of
UpTheSpa™ during 2016. Be aware that the
voucher cannot be combined with other promotions.

1. How much do you enjoy colonoscopies?

(a) I love them!
(b) They are very enjoyable.
(c) Colonoscopies are o.k., I guess.
(d) I don't mind one every now and then.

2. What type of music would you prefer while getting
a colonoscopy?

(a) Anything by the Bee Gees will do.
(b) Enya is fine but I wouldn't Kenny G.
(c) A colonoscopy without Iron Maiden is like unbuttered bread.
(d) No music. I like the natural sounds involved in the process.

3. If your next colonoscopy would include aromatherapy,
what fragrances would you prefer?

(a) Lavender is the only way.
(b) Wasabi goes very well with a colonoscopy session.
(c) Peaches and cream, baby!
(d) I like the natural antiseptic touch of hospitals.

4. Which services would you appreciate to be included in a
colonoscopy package?

(a) Mindfulness workshops.
(b) Tarot reading.
(c) Manicure and pedicure.
(d) All of the above.

5. How much would you be willing to pay for a full day at
a colonoscopy spa including some or all of the above services?

(a) Anything above €1,000
(b) Between €500 and €999
(c) Between €250 and €499
(d) Less than €249

Thank you very much for helping UpTheSpa™ in its
goal to bring you the world's first high end colonoscopy
spa experience!

The post that was quoted here has been removed

Spot colorectal cancer on time and, henceforth, save your life?

Having a tube up the bum is just an added bonus, mind you.

if you include a free prostate exam you can count me in

Originally posted by lemondrop
if you include a free prostate exam you can count me in

YOU GOT IT! And on the house!

The post that was quoted here has been removed

And that is the perfect state to enjoy a colonoscopy, baby. ROAR!

Originally posted by Seitse
YOU GOT IT! And on the house!

yay!
I'm in
or your in
whatever

The post that was quoted here has been removed

Counteroffer:

I have a house brown, benzos, Iggy Pop, a doctor who looks like
Danny Trejo, candles with the Virgin of Guadalupe image, and a
memory foam mattress.

You in?

1.a
2.a
3.a
4.d
5.a

Originally posted by Captain Strange
1.a
2.a
3.a
4.d
5.a

Thank you, Cap! Your input will help us to offer you nothing but the best.

katie couric had her's televised

could you make mine a must see televised event?
for a body double I would like kim kardashian to be my butt

Originally posted by lemondrop
katie couric had her's televised

could you make mine a must see televised event?
for a body double I would like kim kardashian to be my butt

I've already contacted the guys of the periscope app.

I'm on top of this, our dearest client. Only the best will do!

Thank you all for the PMs. Yes, I am happy to send you
the discount vocuher if you submit your responses to the
survey by PM. And, yes, we can use Möet to perform an
enema before the colonoscopy, of course.