1. Sunday
God damn. This is the best written thing I've ever encountered on this site.
2. Cigarette whore
Really, really good. I found the last sentence a pity though. I think if the sentence had ended: The older kids didn’t really care either way and I think they let me hang so they could bum smokes when they ran out. The smoke would stab like a dagger directly into our eyes but we were cool….. it would have been much, much better. Nobody, but the really drugges, would light their cig's the wrong way, you see....
3. Mad cows and Englishmen
Excellent stuff. I remember the CJD stuff (or whatever it was, so presumably I don't remember it all that well....which is worrying...) well.
This was a lot of fun for me to read because it was witty in the Hitchhiker sense and it didn’t take itself or anything seriously.
My favorite line: I realised that matter and energy were two halves of the same coin and that religion was the largest psychosis in history. Sharp.
2.ADHD :
I liked the way the author was effect in bringing you into the mindset of someone with this disorder. I thought the almost frantic pace of the writing was extremely efficient for accomplishing this.
The line I didn’t like because I guessed it revealed perhaps the age of the author: ‘Roll a dice. Phone a friend. Don’t you want to play dungeons and dragons with me? Best not, there is something else happening somewhere else.’ I just thought it was not place with the rest of the story but I thought it was great.
My favorite line: ‘AD&D isn’t an affliction, it’s a game. You play it, sitting around a table, rolling dice and acting like you’re an elf.’
3.Sunday :
Very real writing at some parts that spoke a common language. I think it dealt very well with why some people stay in destructive relationships which seems to be convenience and much of the time it is thoughtless. I didn’t like repeating the word ‘solace’ twice so close together.
My favorite line: ‘This is just how it is, people meet people and they fall apart into each other, and if it doesn’t work out you walk out no-questions-asked like it happens every day. In and out, constantly seeking and breaking fake-smiles with rotten honesty and then you move on when it becomes too much.’ Great story.
Originally posted by angie88 1. entry removed (that was really easy reading 😀)
2. Adhd
3. Mad cow thingy
When does voting close? Do I get to guess who wrote what before you post the names? please?????
No guessing please Angie, it goes against the point of the competition, i.e. you're supposed to judge a piece on its own merit without prejudice. I'll take your votes as:
1. Adhd
2. Mad cow
3. Cigarette whore
Originally posted by hopscotch No guessing please Angie, it goes against the point of the competition, i.e. you're supposed to judge a piece on its own merit without prejudice. I'll take your votes as:
1. Adhd
2. Mad cow
3. Cigarette whore
you got it down right. Obviously, I didn't vote on who I think wrote it... and I wouldn't post it til voting is closed. Can I send you a pm and you tell me how many I got right?
Yes, I shall do that. Right away. Because I can't move in my games because I don't know how to play chess.
Originally posted by angie88 you got it down right. Obviously, I didn't vote on who I think wrote it... and I wouldn't post it til voting is closed. Can I send you a pm and you tell me how many I got right?
Yes, I shall do that. Right away. Because I can't move in my games because I don't know how to play chess.
The Red Hot Pawn Prose Competition 4
20 May '05 15:18
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