Professor Schnook

I am Professor Schnook! For the last thirty years, I have been studying the droppings of the midget South American sparrow. They are very small. You are small. You will lose. Your efforts are futile. Your life is futile. All life is futile. Thank You.

Please donate to the Schnook Institute for Research and Heavy Equipment Repair. We are presently proving that global warming is good for you. Send all donations, including canned goods, to Sal Monella(c/o: Ponzi Inc., Witness Protection Program).

I will claim time-outs, brown-outs, close-outs or shootouts.

Sincerely,
Professor Schnook

PS: Did I tell you that you will lose?