Jokes

Jokes

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w

Joined
02 Jan 06
Moves
12857
28 Jul 15

How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb?

Just Juan.

Boston Lad

USA

Joined
14 Jul 07
Moves
43012
28 Jul 15

Originally posted by whodey
How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb?

Just Juan.
Ha,

Boston Lad

USA

Joined
14 Jul 07
Moves
43012
28 Jul 15

Originally posted by Mammy Blue
Uncle Bob (85) and aunt Mary (79) are going to be married soon.
While wandering around the town's mall they come across a pharmacy.
Uncle Bob walks in and asks to talk to the pharmacist.
"Do you sell headache pills, muscle spasma pills, ointments for bad backs?"
"yes we do," replies the pharmacist.
"Do you sell bandages, straps for dislocated shoulde ...[text shortened]... er-the-counter pills?"
"Yes, but why do you ask?"
"We're looking for a good Bridal Gift shop."
Hey, Mammy, GB's wife wasn't named "Mary"; it was Evelyn. lol Great joke...

w

Joined
02 Jan 06
Moves
12857
28 Jul 15

Asian grading scale.

"A" (average)
"B" (bad)
"C" (catostrophic)
"D" (disowned)
"F" (forgotten forever)

chemist

Linkenheim

Joined
22 Apr 05
Moves
656717
01 Aug 15

"My father was so happy when he learned hat you are a chess player"
"Is he also playig chess?"
"No but my last boyfriend was a boxer..."

w

Joined
02 Jan 06
Moves
12857
02 Aug 15

Planned Parenthood received around $500 million in taxpayer money last year

To give you an idea of how much that is, it's around 50 or so fetus livers.

w

Joined
02 Jan 06
Moves
12857
02 Aug 15
1 edit

My son keeps telling me that the boogie man is hiding under his bed every night and is scared to death to be in there by himself. However, one night I caught him laughing while looking under his bed. I asked him what he was laughing at. He said he was laughing at the boogie man who was crying. Confused, I asked what exactly he was talking about. He replied, after watching the news the boogie man is the one who is scared. He keeps looking under his bed for Planned Parenthood.

w

Joined
02 Jan 06
Moves
12857
02 Aug 15

Why did the fetus cross the road?


Planned Parenthood moved the dumpster

w

Joined
02 Jan 06
Moves
12857
02 Aug 15

Here is a great abortion joke at Planned Parenthood.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

You will never know.

Joined
18 Jan 07
Moves
12472
02 Aug 15

Originally posted by whodey
Here is a great abortion joke at Planned Parenthood.
What's your problem, Whodey, did your mum just tell you you were an accident?

p

Joined
27 Dec 05
Moves
143878
02 Aug 15

Duchess went to the police station and said " Sir, I have been Graped " .
"Graped ! " the officer replied " don't you mean raped ?
No, she replied there was a bunch of them .

JO

Joined
01 Apr 09
Moves
26584
02 Aug 15

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar.
The bartender says, "What is this, a joke?"

Boston Lad

USA

Joined
14 Jul 07
Moves
43012
02 Aug 15

Knock, knock: "Who's there?"

"Sam and Jan."

"Sam and Jan who?"

"Sam enchanted evening....."

p

Joined
27 Dec 05
Moves
143878
02 Aug 15
1 edit

Quasimodo complained to his wife .." you knew I was going to the pub tonight, why didn't you iron my shirt " ....." it's your fault Quasi you didn't tell me where you put the wok "... his wife replied.

Quiz Master

RHP Arms

Joined
09 Jun 07
Moves
48793
03 Aug 15

Originally posted by phil3000
Quasimodo .......
I don't recall the name ... but the face rings a bell.