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  1. 05 Apr '10 18:42
    Anyone interested?
  2. 06 Apr '10 08:40
    This is probably a silly question, but what's a patzer?
  3. Standard member nimzo5
    Ronin
    06 Apr '10 19:48
    derogatory term for a weak player.
  4. Standard member SwissGambit
    Caninus Interruptus
    06 Apr '10 20:12
    Moderator: Good evening and welcome to the first Patzer-Skype session. We'll start by opening up the floor for your favorite patzerly stories and anecdotes.
    Alan: Embarrassing moment last weekend ... I made a move, then went to the restroom, and when I came back, my Queen was gone!
    Ted: I can beat that easily ... I got mated on move 11 by a kid that was so short, he had to sit on a telephone book to see the board.
    Glen: My opponent and the TD conspired against me to make me lose the game. They invented some weird 'rule' that allowed his pawn to take mine even though it wasn't on the same square! They called it en passant or some such. They joked about it in French as they marked a "0" for my result. Totally pissed me off. I tried to protest that we ought to follow American rules in the US, but they just laughed all the louder.
    Bob: I got "Knight-forked" 5 moves in a row. It was more like we were playing checkers and he was jumping over all my pieces.
  5. 07 Apr '10 11:57
    /me signs up

  6. Standard member SwissGambit
    Caninus Interruptus
    07 Apr '10 16:41
    Phil: I was walking by some players doing a post-mortem. I knew I probably should have kept my mouth shut, but curiosity got the better of me and I blurted out, "What's wrong with Nc6??" They just stopped, looked at me like I had the plague, then kept on analyzing their line.
  7. 07 Apr '10 17:31
    Originally posted by SwissGambit
    Phil: I was walking by some players doing a post-mortem. I knew I probably should have kept my mouth shut, but curiosity got the better of me and I blurted out, "What's wrong with Nc6??" They just stopped, looked at me like I had the plague, then kept on analyzing their line.
    Almost spot on, but my name's not Phil...
  8. Subscriber Paul Leggett
    Chess Librarian
    08 Apr '10 01:41
    Originally posted by SwissGambit
    Moderator: Good evening and welcome to the first Patzer-Skype session. We'll start by opening up the floor for your favorite patzerly stories and anecdotes.
    Alan: Embarrassing moment last weekend ... I made a move, then went to the restroom, and when I came back, my Queen was gone!
    Ted: I can beat that easily ... I got mated on move 11 by a kid that wa ...[text shortened]... a row. It was more like we were playing checkers and he was jumping over all my pieces.
    Moose: "My opponent and I played several moves until I realized that his set was one of those with the extra queens, and he set his up with two queens and no king. He said that since we had already played more than 10 moves, it was too late to start over. I countered that, since he had no king, it was a draw because he had insufficient losing chances. We couldn't find the TD, but we did find the bar, so everything ended well. As best I can remember, anyway."
  9. 08 Apr '10 05:52
    Skype's chess is buggy. Been awhile since I've played it though, they may have fixed it up.