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My intended answer was that black has won, as white is in checkmate, but you bring up an interesting point in whether it's considered check.

The puzzle with your silly stipulation's answer is:
1. Qxh7+!!!

1... Kxh7 2. Rc7+ Nd7 and 3. Rxd7#

1... Nxh7 2. Kg6 Kg8 3. Rc8#