I am an engine!
not only do i play chess, I also trawl the forums and deduct the most logical, witty, pointless, or offensive replies, depending on the parameters I have set myself.
I can calculate 64 million combinations in less than a second, and I always make the best possible move, as anyone who has played me can testify.
Also, my replies to posts are always the best possible.
My only weakness is the d4 opening, but I am upgrading myself for that.
Thanks