I was on bad form last night.
Well not in a controlled manner, it was my bodily emissions of internal combustibles not on form.
I was watching the last ten minutes of a film, wife had gone to bed. And phut! The smallest of whispers, not even noise. And just 0,2 of a second in duration. I continued eating my supper and thought nothing of it. Two minutes later I was being strangled. I was gagging for my last air as I got to open the window, saved as I did.
Well I'd missed the end of the film, so off to bed did I.
I got in, lay down and settled and was just relaxing. Then my horror!
Phut, that tiny whisper. OMG. What do I do. Now there as a gaseous monster, a stealth traveller lurking beneath the quilt.
Quick boys gas, quick boys! As I thought of my options available.
1. Do I leave it there and hope she's asleep?
2. D0 I gently waft my foot, lifting the quilt and dissipate a tiny amount every 2 minutes? - Too uncontrolled.
3. Do I get up, lifting the quilt high, and pretend to go to the loo, and leave her to deal with it? - No not an option.
4. Do I tell her there is an abhorrent presence below our comfort cover? - She may be asleep.
Option 1. Hide it. Leave it there, I thought. She'll never know.
And just as I thought 'yeah that's ok' she turned and asked for a hug.
Out it came, the monster surfaced and the little phut filled the room.
Did I get a hug?... didn't even touch my feet all night. :'(
The moral? Don't take option 1 and try and hide lurking monsters, they'll come back and bite. Deal with it head on! 😉
