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P
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Grammar dyslexic

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So so so many joke threads. All asking for GOOD jokes, and there were some really good ones. But you can't have the good without the bad. Post your terrible, worst, stupid and senseless jokes here.

One example is this terrible on from "Lost" :

What is black and white and red all over?


A penguin with a sunburn 😞😳😞

Ok people, do your worst

shavixmir
Lord

Sewers of Holland

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Originally posted by PocketKings
So so so many joke threads. All asking for GOOD jokes, and there were some really good ones. But you can't have the good without the bad. Post your terrible, worst, stupid and senseless jokes here.

One example is this terrible on from "Lost" :

What is black and white and red all over?


A penguin with a sunburn 😞😳😞

Ok people, do your worst
A direct translation from Dutch:

It's red and it flies through the first chamber (parliment)?
A menstruating question.

Funnily enough in Dutch it does make a little more sense.

F
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London

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Originally posted by PocketKings
So so so many joke threads. All asking for GOOD jokes, and there were some really good ones. But you can't have the good without the bad. Post your terrible, worst, stupid and senseless jokes here.

One example is this terrible on from "Lost" :

What is black and white and red all over?


A penguin with a sunburn 😞😳😞

Ok people, do your worst
Three tomatoes walking down the road; mommy tomato, daddy tomato and baby tomato. Daddy tomato looks back and sees baby tomato lagging behind. So he walks up to his son, squishes him and says "ketchup". 😞

shavixmir
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Sewers of Holland

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Originally posted by Freddie2004
Three tomatoes walking down the road; mommy tomato, daddy tomato and baby tomato. Daddy tomato looks back and sees baby tomato lagging behind. So he walks up to his son, squishes him and says "ketchup". 😞
That did come out of a Xmas cracker, didn't it?

F
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London

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Originally posted by shavixmir
That did come out of a Xmas cracker, didn't it?
I watched pulp fiction last night πŸ˜€

w

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So a dyslexic man walks into a bra...

V

Merry Crimbo Land

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Originally posted by PocketKings
So so so many joke threads. All asking for GOOD jokes, and there were some really good ones. But you can't have the good without the bad. Post your terrible, worst, stupid and senseless jokes here.

One example is this terrible on from "Lost" :

What is black and white and red all over?


A penguin with a sunburn 😞😳😞

Ok people, do your worst
Its a news paper

P
Banned from edits

Grammar dyslexic

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Originally posted by Vivaldi
Its a news paper
c'mon dude. theres more than one stupid answer to that joke. How many diiferent reasons have you heard for why the chicken crossed the damn road?

DS
I'm A Mighty Pirateβ„’

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What's the difference between hard and light?
~ You can get to sleep with a light on!

A bacon sandwich walks into a bar and orders a pint The barman shakes his head and says "Sorry. We don't serve food here."

DS

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1) Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2) Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One says, "I've lost my electron".
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."

3) A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says "I'll serve you,but don't start anything."

4) Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

5) A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

6) A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

7) Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

8) "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'"
"That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."
"Is it common?"
"It's Not Unusual."

9) Two cows standing next to each other in a field, Daisy says to Dolly,
"I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," said Dolly.
"It's true, no bull!" exclaimed Daisy.

10) An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

11) Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

12) A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's
cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.
Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."
"What? Because he's cross-eyed?"
"No, because he's really heavy."

13) Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mom or my dad, or maybe my older brother Colin or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But I'm pretty sure it's Colin.

14) I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

15) I went to the butcher's the other day and I bet him 50 bucks that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf.
He said, "No, the steaks are too high."

16) A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!"
The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off your arms!"

17) I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

18) Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly but when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

19) What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

20) Two termites walk into a bar. One asked, "Is the bar tender here."

a

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What do you call a penguin in the middle of the desert?


Lost.

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