There is a blond driving through the country. She has just died her hair brown because she is sick of being made fun of. She is really hungry. She stops at a farmers house and says Hi! If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I have one? Farmer says ok. She quickly counts them and says 91! The farmer looks around puzzeledly and says Ok. Take one. When the Blond is walking back to her car the farmer asks If I can guess your natural hair color, can I have my dog back?
More Blonde Jokes
What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA?
"Look! They spelled MACY'S wrong!
Why can't blondes take coffee breaks?
They're too hard to retrain.
What do you call 9 blondes standing in a circle?
A dope ring.
Why can't blondes be pharmacists?
Because they can't fit the bottle in the typewriter.
What's the definition of eternity?
4 blondes at a 4-way stop
What do you call five blondes at the bottom of the ocean?
An air pocket.
Why do blondes have TGIF on their shirts?
"This goes in front"
Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks. The 1st blonde said,"These look like deer tracks,"and the other one said , " No,they look like moose tracks". They argued until the train hit them.
Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door to their Mercedes with a coat hanger. They tried and tried to get the door opened,but they couldn't. The girl with the coat hanger stopped to catch her breath,and her friend said anxiously,"Hurry up! Its starting to rain and the top's down!
Why do blondes like lightning?
They think someone is taking their picture!
How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
Tell her a joke on Wednesday
Johnny was an 8-year old in remedial class. One day his teacher asked him a question. "Johnny, if there are five crows on a fence and the farmer shoots one, how many are left?". "None." comes the reply. "Sorry Johnny, but that's wrong. Think again".
"None, miss." is the reply once again.
"Could you explain please, Johnny?" asked the bemused teacher. "Okay," agrees Johnny, "he shoots one and there is blood and guts everywhere. So the others fly off terrified.".
"Well that's not exactly the answer I was looking for, the answer is four. But I do like the way you were thinking." remarked the teacher.
"Could I ask you a question, miss?" asked Johnny.
"Certainly, Johnny."
"Three woman are walking down the road. One is licking an ice lolly, one is sucking an ice lolly and the other is biting an ice lolly. Which one is married?"
The teacher ponders the question for a few moments then replies, "The one licking the ice lolly!" she answers.
"No," retorts Johnny, "the one wearing the wedding ring. But I do like the way you were thinking.".
Two little kids, aged six and eight, decide it's time to learn how to swear. So, the eight-year-old says to the six-year-old, "Okay, you say `ass' and I'll say `hell'". All excited about their plan, they troop downstairs, where their mother asks them what they'd like for breakfast. "Aw, hell," says the eight-year-old, "gimme some Cheerios." His mother backhands him off the stool, sending him bawling out of the room, and turns to the younger brother. "What'll you have?"
"I dunno," quavers the six-year-old, "but you can bet your ass it ain't gonna be Cheerios
