"If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman.
He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial.
The lawyer was trying to undermine the policeman's credibility...
Q: "Officer did you see my client fleeing the scene?"
A: "No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away."
Q: "Officer -- who provided this description?"
A: "The officer who responded to the scene."
Q: "A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?
A: "Yes, sir. With my life."
Q: "With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?"
A: "Yes sir, we do."
Q: "And do you have a locker in the room?"
A: "Yes sir, I do."
Q: "And do you have a lock on your locker?"
A: "Yes sir."
Q: Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?"
A: "You see, sir – we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room."
The courtroom erupted in laughter, and a prompt recess was called.
@sonhouse saidHahahahahaha... very good.
"If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman.
He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial.
The lawyer was trying to undermine the policeman's credibility...
Q: "Officer did you see my client fleeing the scene?"
A: "No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of t ...[text shortened]... wn to walk through that room."
The courtroom erupted in laughter, and a prompt recess was called.
@Suzianne saidHere is another one:
Hahahahahaha... very good.
80 + couple has garage attacked by thieves:
At bedtime, the 81-year-old woman said to her 83-year-old husband:
"Listen... I just looked out the window, and I think the garage light is on. Would you get up and turn it off?"
With great difficulty, the old man got out of bed, opened the door, and went outside. He saw five or six burglars tampering with the garage door. He immediately called the police station.
"Look... take down my address. It’s just my wife and me here, and five or six thieves are attacking my garage. Please send a police team quickly..."
The dispatcher replied, "We've noted your address. Don't worry. No team is available right now. I'll send someone as soon as I can get a team."
Frustrated, the old man watched the burglars struggling with the garage locks. Two minutes later, he called the police station again:
"Listen... there's no need to send anyone now. I’ve shot all five of them."
The police station erupted in chaos. Within five minutes, a police team arrived in the street with a helicopter, paramedics, three doctors, and two ambulances. Soon, they had the criminals under control. Later, the team leader casually walked up to the old man and asked:
"You said you shot them, didn’t you?"
"And didn’t you say no team was available?"
