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  1. Standard memberGrampy Bobby
    Boston Lad
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    05 Apr '14 19:123 edits
    Need a Hug? Got a Few Genuine Online Hugs to Give?

    "The Art of Hugging: When A Hug Is Not All That It's Cracked Up To Be" Published on July 8, 2010 by Srini Pillay, M.D. in Debunking Myths of the Mind "Hugging is a physical acknowledgment of the presence of another with the intention of expressing affection. Sometimes hugging is meant to also express reunion after separation and in that case it represents "affection beyond words." Over the years though, hugging has assumed many uncomfortable forms, some of which I mention below to indicate how complex the phenomenon can be. Also, for each hug there is a picture to more clearly illustrate the hug that I am referring to. Funny enough, when you look up hugs on "Google images", there are an extraordinary number of hugs from political figures.

    (1) The Sideways Hug: This hug is commonly seen when two (often heterosexual) men move toward each other to hug. As they approach each other, the thought of their bodies colliding becomes a higher priority than the politeness of the hug, and the sideways hug is the end-result. Both people feel slightly uncomfortable, but the completion of the usually short-hug leaves both people feeling very relieved.

    (2) The Back Pat: This hug signifies the confusion that results when the bodies of two people meet, but there is no idea what to do after this. The back pat becomes the metronome action behind the silence, counting the beats until the music of the speaking begins again. If you are someone who likes to hug, the back pat can be a total disappointment as it sometimes is curiously dismissive. It may inadvertently convey "yes, yes" or "that's okay" when you have no experience that warrants that response.

    (3) The Full-On Hug: This hug has many complex scenarios. It is best performed unselfconsciously without much thought. This ideal is often thwarted if one of the people has breasts, or if the crotch becomes inadvertently part of the hug. Then, the notion of un-selfconsciousness usually goes out the window. This hug is also best executed with pleasurable sounds (ahhhh! Being an example), but the sounds need to be congruent to the situation (hmmm! For example does not work in the breast or crotch situation).

    (4)The "Pleased to Meet You Belly Button" (PYMBB) Hug: You know from afar, that when someone is 6'3" and over, and if you are an average height, that you will likely encounter some strange part of their bodies in the course of the intended hug. Your lips may land on their neck, or in more extreme cases, their chest or belly button. The height difference makes for significant discomfort, so this is one of the fastest hugs out there. Imagine if you lingered on at someone's neck or belly button!

    (5) The Shoulder Hug: This hug starts with an appraisal of the other person's face ["Look at you"] but never quite makes it to the full hug stage. It may transition to a shoulder pat with one hand accompanied by a smile, but a definitive indication that there will be no point in the communication outside of eye contact.

    (6) The Tearful Hug: When this hug is awkward, it is usually because your tears and nasal secretions are covering the clothes of another person. This should be avoided at all costs. Tearful hugs only really work in real intimacy, and even then, people often have to use some effort to overlook the slimy mess on their neck or clothes.

    (7) The Elbow Hug: This hug is best executed with an approaching smile, back arched, and then hands to the other person's elbows. It is also well suited to the "look at you" exclamation, but it often involves two people who have a mutual understanding that they do not want to wrinkle each other's clothes. Other stilted gestures can accompany this-such as a cheek squeeze, or a "you look great!" exclamation.

    So while hugging ostensibly increases oxytocin and trust by decreasing activation of the brains "fear" center, the "amygdala", I am curious about the effects of hugging when it is less artful or authentic. I suspect that the amygdala will be less content to recline in a proverbial hammock and more likely to stand on guard until some genuine emotion comes through." http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/debunking-myths-the-mind/201007/the-art-hugging

    * Red Hot Pawn General Forum Online Hugs Café *

    I've got a Man Hug for ChessPraxis to express my joy over the birth of his daughter's baby girl. Also a Welcome Home Man Hug for cashthetrash. And an I Miss You Hug for drewnogal (hope you're okay). Each of your favorite adult beverages are waiting to be served; first and last rounds are on me. If you need a hug or have any to give, The RHP Hugs Café is for you.
  2. Standard memberGrampy Bobby
    Boston Lad
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    07 Apr '14 18:101 edit
    "The Benefits of Hugging" Wendy Strgar June 22, 2011

    "A hug is a universal medicine, it is how we handshake from the heart. -Anonymous

    For decades we’ve known that babies won’t thrive without physical holding and affection. There is little that will comfort and settle small children as the warm embrace of their family. Yet it is still not uncommon for parents to stop hugging their kids as they reach puberty. And for many adults, the amount of physical nurturing we receive declines as we age, even as medical studies confirm that the health benefits of physical touch extend throughout our lives.

    We lose touch with each other early in our adult lives as our needs for physical affection are confused with our emerging sexuality. Our discomfort and lack of understanding about our sexuality inadvertently colors our capacity to connect even in something as benign as a hug. I listened with both shock and grief as my 13-year-old daughter shared how she was warned at school with a PDA for hugging her boyfriend. “You can’t hug for more than 2 seconds,” she said. Much of our mistrust of physical affection is learned and the rigid personal boundary space we establish in response often only serves to later prevent our earnest desires to connect.

    Virgina Satir, who was often referred to as the mother of family therapy, determined that “We need four hugs a day for survival. We need eight hugs a day for maintenance. We need twelve hugs a day for growth.” Her presumption is backed by research, which consistently demonstrates that our emotional wellbeing is deeply impacted by the physical love we experience and that touch and hugging are primary vehicles in the brain’s development of basic positive emotions. According to Linda Blair, a clinical psychologist at Bath University, “Touch affects the cerebellar brain system, an area of the brain where basic positive emotions such as trust and affection probably come from.”

    As in the mind, so in the body as recent medical research at University of North Carolina found that both blood pressure and levels of Cortisol, the hormone produced when we’re under stress, were significantly lowered (particularly in women) when subjects hugged their partners for at least twenty seconds. Another study that took place in 2000 showed that hugging babies while they were given blood tests made them cry less and kept their heart rates steadier. Other studies suggest a strong link between increased hugs and lower risk of heart disease.

    In addition to the clear health benefits, hugging also provides a window into the health of your relationship and offers an easy way to improve it. Hugging Until Relaxed is a therapeutic technique that encourages partners to hold each other while in a standing hug. Ultimately, both partners find stability and comfort in the embrace by achieving equilibrium of balance and closeness while holding each other. This technique, introduced by David Schnarch in Passionate Marriage, allows both partners to open up to a deeply intimate space where both are held and fully relaxed. This technique generally translates into better overall communication and more passionate intimacy. Opening up to being held is a powerful metaphor. A relaxed and full embrace allows us to feel and connect bodies in a way that literally couples us."

    http://www.care2.com/greenliving/the-benefits-of-hugging.html

    Still don't need a hug? lol
  3. Standard memberRemoved
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    07 Apr '14 18:55
    Originally posted by Grampy Bobby
    [b]"The Benefits of Hugging" Wendy Strgar June 22, 2011

    "A hug is a universal medicine, it is how we handshake from the heart. -Anonymous

    For decades we’ve known that babies won’t thrive without physical holding and affection. There is little that will comfort and settle small children as the warm embrace of their family. Yet it is still not ...[text shortened]...

    http://www.care2.com/greenliving/the-benefits-of-hugging.html

    Still don't need a hug? lol[/b]
    cmon grampy cuddle up
  4. Standard memberGrampy Bobby
    Boston Lad
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    09 Apr '14 01:53
    "How to Type Hugs on Facebook" By Julius Vandersteen, eHow Contributor

    "A hug is a great way to show your affection for a friend, as well as to provide support. If you're a fan of hugging your friends in real life, you might also want to "hug" them on Facebook by typing characters that symbolize hugging them. For example, if you can't be with your friend in person when she tells you that she just got a great new job , or you want to console someone who indicates on his Facebook page that he's feeling sad, but you can still reach out and hug people by typing on your keyboard. Have a question? Get an answer from online tech support now!

    Instructions:

    1. Launch your Web browser, log into Facebook and start writing a message to your friend.

    2. Type three open parentheses followed by three close parentheses: ((())) to send a lot of hugs to someone.

    3. Type a colon, followed by a capital letter D and then the Less Than symbol: : D< to represent giving someone a hug.

    4. Type a colon, followed by an close parentheses and then a capital letter : ) X to signify you wrapping your arms around the person you want to hug.

    5. Type two open parentheses, followed by the word hug, and then type two close parentheses: ((hug)) to send someone a literal hug.

    6. Type the Greater Than symbol followed by four dashes, an open parentheses, a caret, an underscore, a caret, a close parentheses, four dashes and the "Less Than" symbol like so: >----(^_^)----< to depict a person with arms stretched widely to give a hug." http://www.ehow.com/how_8539023_type-hugs-facebook.html
  5. SubscriberPonderable
    chemist
    Linkenheim
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    14 Apr '14 14:15
    ...Hugging is a physical acknowledgment...
    internet has limits. If I come to Boston I will give you a hug.
  6. Standard memberGrampy Bobby
    Boston Lad
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    14 Apr '14 18:111 edit
    Originally posted by Ponderable
    internet has limits. If I come to Boston I will give you a hug.
    A man hug at one of my favorite German Restaurants in Cambridge within walking distance of Harvard University.
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