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Oh skankiest of skankies...

Oh skankiest of skankies...

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And no, I know not what the plural of skanky is, but believe me, once you've dipped into the horrendous blistering of my being, you won't care....

Oh yes, in my life time I've stumbled across festering clitoral boils, I've (accidently) fell across pulsating frenulum warts and I've closed my eyes to marmary protruberances leaking pus...

But never in my months of wading through human waste, my having shat my way through seven provinces of seatless toilets in India or having to describe 3rd degree female circumcision for a thesis have I ever had the misfortune to suffer what I now have encountered.

And encountered it I have. Hell yes. It's on me! ON ME!!!

Anybody laughing will be dragged out of the forum, tortured and shot....

I have athletes foot.
"Oh...is that all?" I hear you say?
"Oh...it could be worse, you could have athletes feet..." I hear you quip...

"Oh but hang on!" I must retort!

I have athletes foot...on my hand! On my left palm!!!
OH GOD!!!!

How the F did it get there? See... this is the problem.
Yes, I've been in some skanky places in my life....but to actually contract a fungi infection in your palm? Sweet Jesus....

Talking of Jesus, I, as an atheist, sometimes suffer from stigmata...but that's irony on a grander scale than this bloody post...

IT GOT THERE BECAUSE IT'S INFECTIOUS!
It's the only sane reasoning here.
Now, don't get me wrong, I don't mind smearing foot creme onto my hands, albeit slightly embarrassing, because my brother's girlfriend had to give it to me....which makes me think my whole brother's family must be a family of skanks as well....
But...
But..
But.

But...when I'm masturbating, I cup my balls with my left hand (don't we all?).
and if it's infectious...???

So, I was hunched over on the couch.
Well! I'm sure as hell not going to go to a doctors and ask if I've got athlete's scrotum, am I?

Now. I'm staying at a friend's, because I've just moved back to Holland. And I seriously thought he was away for the evening. I did. I seriously did.

Well, needless to say, it didn't look too good when he walked in on me.

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Originally posted by shavixmir
Well, needless to say, it didn't look too good when he walked in on me.
Was his oven mitt cupping your balls?

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Originally posted by shavixmir
And no, I know not what the plural of skanky is, but believe me, once you've dipped into the horrendous blistering of my being, you won't care....

Oh yes, in my life time I've stumbled across festering clitoral boils, I've (accidently) fell across pulsating frenulum warts and I've closed my eyes to marmary protruberances leaking pus...

But never in m ...[text shortened]... needless to say, it didn't look too good when he walked in on me.
Its hideous, I had it not long ago..

And somehow it found home in my other palm too.

I had the cream on and had to cover it.. but it was so red and sore that everytime I unbandaged them, it looked like I was having stigmata..

So it could be worse, believe you me..

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Originally posted by Peachy
Its hideous, I had it not long ago..

And somehow it found home in my other palm too.

I had the cream on and had to cover it.. but it was so red and sore that everytime I unbandaged them, it looked like I was having stigmata..

So it could be worse, believe you me..
You've had athlete's hand as well?

Jesus. Did I ever meet you? Did we shake hands? Did you give it to me???

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Originally posted by shavixmir
You've had athlete's hand as well?

Jesus. Did I ever meet you? Did we shake hands? Did you give it to me???
I might have shaken hands with my Australian mate just before he travelled to South Africa to see the sharks. One of the little fishes he caught slipped out of his hand he tells me and I bet you it travelled with the Northern current to India..

You had fish in India didn't you? there you go.. never blame a peach, its always the fish' fault.

No no no .. it wasn't the devilish athlete's hands!

It was Stigmata...!! Repent my son.

2 edits
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I'm highly prone to athlete's foot, but I've never had it on my palm. I get it under my ring a lot though.

I did have ringworm a couple of times, which is a more common name for athlete's crotch.

Now I am very very careful and kill it before it becomes significant - and it never gets near my balls any more.

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Originally posted by shavixmir
And no, I know not what the plural of skanky is, but believe me, once you've dipped into the horrendous blistering of my being, you won't care....

Oh yes, in my life time I've stumbled across festering clitoral boils, I've (accidently) fell across pulsating frenulum warts and I've closed my eyes to marmary protruberances leaking pus...

But never in m ...[text shortened]... needless to say, it didn't look too good when he walked in on me.
Well...you've left me hanging!! Do you have athletes scrotum???

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Freaks.

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Originally posted by darvlay
Freaks.
😞

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Originally posted by cmsMaster
Well...you've left me hanging!! Do you have athletes scrotum???
Never. I am completely uninfected now. The closest it ever got to my scrotum was my inner thigh.

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
Never. I am completely uninfected now. The closest it ever got to my scrotum was my inner thigh.
I was asking Shav, but thanks for the info. I guess. :/

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
I'm highly prone to athlete's foot, but I've never had it on my palm. I get it under my ring a lot though.

I did have ringworm a couple of times, which is a more common name for athlete's crotch.

Now I am very very careful and kill it before it becomes significant - and it never gets near my balls any more.
That is very scary. Oh so very scary...

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Originally posted by cmsMaster
Well...you've left me hanging!! Do you have athletes scrotum???
Well, anyone who has met me will verify that my body doesn't lend well to bending double.
But, as far as I could make out in the candle light, there were no little blisters of moisture waiting to erupt between my scrotum and my anus...

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Originally posted by shavixmir
Well, anyone who has met me will verify that my body doesn't lend well to bending double.
But, as far as I could make out in the candle light, there were no little blisters of moisture waiting to erupt between my scrotum and my anus...
Ewwww.

I never had that.

2 edits
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Originally posted by shavixmir
That is very scary. Oh so very scary...
The way you get ringworm, by the way, is to put underwear on before socks when your feet are infested. Remember - socks first, then boxers!

No I didn't get it whacking off.

Skanky is an adjective. The noun is skank, and the plural is skanks.