Just click My Settings link... and pick:
My Site Settings
Un check the box that says:
"Turn on or off email move notifications whenever your opponent moves? If you turn notifications off you will need to visit Red Hot Pawn to check on the status of your games".
Now you get no more emails, and you can vanish if that is what you like. You can't erase a player name here, just don't come back and consider yourself done at RHP.
Player names are not removed, since there are people you played already and they have your games in their archives.