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  1. 01 Aug '05 11:26
    Here's a little guide, courtesy of Monty Python, for those in the dark.

    The Philosopher's Song
    (Monty Python)

    Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
    Who was very rarely stable.
    Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
    Who could think you under the table.
    David Hume could out-consume
    Schopenhauer and Hegel,
    And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
    Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.
    There's nothing Nietzsche couldn't teach ya
    'Bout the raising of the wrist.
    Socrates himself was permanently pissed.

    John Stuart Mill, lost his own free will,
    On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.
    Plato, they say, could stick it away
    Half a crate of whiskey every day.
    Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,
    Hobbes was fond of his dram,
    And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart:
    "I drink, therefore I am"
    Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed;
    A lovely little thinker but a bugger when he's pissed!