If Jesus...

If Jesus...

Spirituality

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HoH
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asked you to go gay for a guaranteed spot in heaven would you?

d

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I totally would.

DC
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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
asked you to go gay for a guaranteed spot in heaven would you?
Not even for a Klondike bar. The "Jesus" version of Heaven sounds a little like hell to me. :-(

HoH
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Originally posted by David C
Not even for a Klondike bar. The "Jesus" version of Heaven sounds a little like hell to me. :-(
Even if Jesus looked like Brad Pitt?

BWA Soldier

Tha Brotha Hood

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2 edits

Originally posted by David C
Not even for a Klondike bar.
Come on, every man has his price. I'm as straight as God makes 'em, and while I may not do it for a frozen treat, it doesn't take a supernatural being to be able to count high enough to name a tempting enough number of crisp Benjamins to make me take the deal. My idea of heaven is always having a roll so thick that I can't even fold it in half to shove it in my pocket, so I have to go around with a couple [ladies], one on each arm carrying half of it for me.

HoH
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Originally posted by DoctorScribbles
Come on, every man has his price. I'm as straight as God makes 'em, and while I may not do it for a frozen treat, it doesn't take a supernatural being to be able to count high enough to name a tempting enough number of crisp Benjamins to make me take the deal. My idea of heaven is always having a roll so thick that I can't even fold it in half to s ...[text shortened]... , so I have to go around with a couple [ladies], one on each arm carrying half of it for me.
I imagine kirksey would go gay for a plate of waffles with a little Jesus sauce on them.

DC
Flamenco Sketches

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Originally posted by DoctorScribbles
My idea of heaven is always having a roll so thick that I can't even fold it in half to shove it in my pocket.
Sure, but it ain't your idea of Heaven that Jesus runs, is it?

HoH
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1 edit

Originally posted by David C
Sure, but it ain't your idea of Heaven that Jesus runs, is it?
Are you saying that Jesus can't come up with a wad of cash and some super fine ho's for Scribbles? Jesus was the uber pimp, he got all the bitches.

DC
Flamenco Sketches

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2 edits

Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
Are you saying that Jesus can't come up with a wad of cash and some super fine ho's for Scribbles? Jesus was the uber pimp, he got all the bitches.
No, of course not...Jesus can do anything. He could even microwave a burrito so hot that he, himself, could not eat it. However, all that I've read about Heaven in the Official Jesus Guide & Handbook says that it's more like a day in church, except 24x7x365x infinity. Prasing Him endlessly for allowing me to exist so that I may worship Him....

...but if I'm reading you right, you're saying "Heaven ain't nothin' but b!tches an' money"...I'm intrigued.Will there be orgasms in Heaven? Will I have free will enough to pursue my joy of being a Cynical Hedonist?

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1 edit

Originally posted by David C
No, of course not...Jesus can do anything. He could even microwave a burrito so hot that he, himself, could not eat it. However, all that I've read about Heaven in the Official Jesus Guide & Handbook says that it's more like a day in church, except 24x7x365x infinity. Prasing Him endlessly for allowing me to exist so that I may worship Him....

...b in Heaven? Will I have free will enough to pursue my joy of being a Cynical Hedonist?
I am confident that there will be bitches and orgasms in heaven, but, you won't need money. You'll get a big bag of pooka shells that you can buy anything with.

I can't wait to party with Jesus and some of the pagan Gods.

Already mated

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Well, I couldn't "go gay" so to speak, but if God ordered me to . you know . .with Angelina Jolie ... . gosh . i suppose I would have to obey the Divine Spirit, wouldn't I?

g

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
asked you to go gay for a guaranteed spot in heaven would you?
Yes, I would (did).

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Originally posted by gaychessplayer
Yes, I would (did).
Gay.

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Originally posted by gaychessplayer
Yes, I would (did).
Would you go hetro for a couple of twinkies?

L

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15 Sep 07

Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
asked you to go gay for a guaranteed spot in heaven would you?
he would never because he hates that!!!!!!!!!!!!