Jesus, it's like an asylum in here!

Jesus, it's like an asylum in here!

Spirituality

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Guppy poo

Sewers of Holland

Joined
31 Jan 04
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87868
26 Jun 05

Let go the lions and gladiators! That's what I say!!!

Seriously now:

Have you ever heard God? Have you? Have you? Does he speak to you?
And if he does, have you ever told anyone? Don't you think you need help then?

I was reading a book the other day (The ragged trousered philanthropists) and within, it quotes something out of the bible. Can someone give me the exact location (I don't know: Chapter 4.2.5.6 or whatever you use in that thing):
It's about that if you really believe in God and Jesus that you can eat poison and it will not affect you.

See. This my masterplan. I'll cook up some rat poison and challenge the good Christians and see how many of them REALLY believe in their God.

And what's all this about turning the other cheek, I'm led to believe is the Christian thing to do? I bet those gladiators had an easy time....

h

Cosmos

Joined
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26 Jun 05

Originally posted by shavixmir
Let go the lions and gladiators! That's what I say!!!

Seriously now:

Have you ever heard God? Have you? Have you? Does he speak to you?
And if he does, have you ever told anyone? Don't you think you need help then?

I was reading a book the other day (The ragged trousered philanthropists) and within, it quotes something out of the bible. Can so ...[text shortened]... k, I'm led to believe is the Christian thing to do? I bet those gladiators had an easy time....
Sounds like a great plan!

Just distribute that poison to all the churches in the world (and mosques, synagogues, etc - assuming it works for all GOd botherers), and let's make the world a saner place!

Guppy poo

Sewers of Holland

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26 Jun 05

Originally posted by howardgee
Sounds like a great plan!

Just distribute that poison to all the churches in the world (and mosques, synagogues, etc - assuming it works for all GOd botherers), and let's make the world a saner place!
Halleluja Brother Howardgee!!!

f
Bruno's Ghost

In a hot place

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26 Jun 05
1 edit

Originally posted by shavixmir
Let go the lions and gladiators! That's what I say!!!

Seriously now:

Have you ever heard God? Have you? Have you? Does he speak to you?
And if he does, have you ever told anyone? Don't you think you need help then?

I was read ...[text shortened]... Christian thing to do? I bet those gladiators had an easy time....
thats Mark 16:17-18

TD
Enjoying Life

Tirau NZ

Joined
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26 Jun 05

No it won't work.. believers have excuses for everything and answers for nothing.

You are not allowed to test god you know!

Outkast

With White Women

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91452
26 Jun 05

The other part of the verse talks about "taking up venomous serpents." Where I live there are some churches that have this as a regular part of their worship and occasionally someone will get bitten and refuse treatment and die. Most biblical scholars believe that those passages in Mark where later additions and not part of the original versions, but as you can imagine, these people cannot be reasoned with.

I heard a story on the news this past week about an Ethiopian teenage girl who had been kidnapped by a gang and was used as their sex slave or something like that. She had been missing for a number of days and somehow escaped and ran into the bush. She found herself surrounded by a large pride of lions but they did not harm her. When her kidnappers pursued her the lions would not let any of them near her. Eventually the oplice found this girl sitting in the middle of these lions and when they came, the lions dispersed. This is a true story. What are we to make of it? Would any of us be offended if someone were to interpret this as God saving this young girl? Would any of us be offended if it were her interpretation that God sent the lions to protect her?

The point I'm making is that there is no doubt crazy thinking with some religious people. Is it possible to be open to spiritual events outside of our normal way of thinking. When I hear about snake handling I can say it is not a wise thing to do.

Perhaps there are "sheep stories" and there are "goat stories" and it is our task to separate the two.

PD

Arizona, USA

Joined
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656
26 Jun 05

About six years ago on an Internet discussion page, I engaged in a fairly long discussion with a Bible believer. At one point I challenged him thusly:

There are thousands of listings for potential investmentments (stocks, bonds, funds, etc) in the 'Wall Street Journal.' Pray to God, telling Him that a week from today you are going to put five thousand dollars into one of those investments, and 365 days after that you are going to sell that investment and donate all the profit you make to missionary work. Ask God to speak to you the one investment that will do better than all the other ones over that precise period of time, so that you can maximize the amount of good that you do in preaching the Word unto all the world.

Here was the excuse he came up with: "I wouldn't ask God to do that for me, because I would be too tempted to spend the money on myself instead of donating it."

PD

Arizona, USA

Joined
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656
26 Jun 05

Originally posted by kirksey957
... This is a true story. What are we to make of it? Would any of us be offended if someone were to interpret this as God saving this young girl? ...
But then on the other hand there is this true story that I well remember hearing in the news back in the early 1990s:

http://www.the-liberian-group.com/murder_of_the_five_american_nuns.htm

L

Joined
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3061
26 Jun 05

Originally posted by shavixmir
Let go the lions and gladiators! That's what I say!!!

Seriously now:

Have you ever heard God? Have you? Have you? Does he speak to you?
And if he does, have you ever told anyone? Don't you think you need help then?

I was reading a book the other day (The ragged trousered philanthropists) and within, it quotes something out of the bible. Can so ...[text shortened]... k, I'm led to believe is the Christian thing to do? I bet those gladiators had an easy time....
as already suggested, your masterplan will fail since the good christian is not to tempt his god. i like your thinking though.

in my mind, the one defining element of all faith-based religions is in the sound rejection of reason. therefore, the true test as to whether the christian truly believes is in how readily he will reject reason and profess that he can know an unknowable god.

given that reason flows like water off a duck's back to many of the believers here on RHP, i would conclude that they do indeed have genuine faith. i am continually amazed by the easy comfort with which the firm believer quietly discards rational thought. i think it only demonstrates that the comfort of faith is more alluring than the search for truth, which is unyielding and tiresome.

"Faith is bunk."

N

The sky

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26 Jun 05

Originally posted by LemonJello
i think it only demonstrates that the comfort of faith is more alluring than the search for truth, which is unyielding and tiresome.
Yeah... And then they come and call us "mental couch potatoes"... Go figure...

Shavixmir: It's not like an asylum, it is an asylum. 😉

Your Eminence

Scunthorpe

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27 Jun 05

Originally posted by kirksey957


I heard a story on the news this past week about an Ethiopian teenage girl who had been kidnapped by a gang and was used as their sex slave or something like that. She had been missing for a number of days and somehow escaped and ran into the bush. She found herself surrounded by a large pride of lions but they did not harm her. When her kidnapper ...[text shortened]... ere are "sheep stories" and there are "goat stories" and it is our task to separate the two.
After a number of days being held hostage , unbathed , and used as a sex slave ; she probably smelled like cat piss and was identified as one of their own .

i
Deracinated

Sydney

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27 Jun 05

Originally posted by kirksey957
Would any of us be offended if someone were to interpret this as God saving this young girl? Would any of us be offended if it were her interpretation that God sent the lions to protect her?
No, but that's all it is - her interpretation.

Guppy poo

Sewers of Holland

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29 Jun 05

Originally posted by Nordlys
Shavixmir: It's not like an asylum, it is an asylum. 😉
I've worked in asylums.

In fact, I've been sat on top of the rooftop of Petra's youth hostel in Jerusalem listening to two people argue; one thinking he was the new messiah and the other thinking he was the reincarnation of Jesus of Nazerath...

Yet never...
NEVER...

Have I had the misfortune to stumble across such demented ramblings as from the Christians on this forum.

X
Cancerous Bus Crash

p^2.sin(phi)

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29 Jun 05

Originally posted by shavixmir
I've worked in asylums.

In fact, I've been sat on top of the rooftop of Petra's youth hostel in Jerusalem listening to two people argue; one thinking he was the new messiah and the other thinking he was the reincarnation of Jesus of Nazerath...

Yet never...
NEVER...

Have I had the misfortune to stumble across such demented ramblings as from the Christians on this forum.
Now let's be fair there have been some demented ramblings on non-christians behalf as well. Granted not nearly as much but it's not unheard of.

h

Cosmos

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30 Jun 05

Originally posted by shavixmir
I've worked in asylums.

In fact, I've been sat on top of the rooftop of Petra's youth hostel in Jerusalem listening to two people argue; one thinking he was the new messiah and the other thinking he was the reincarnation of Jesus of Nazerath...

Yet never...
NEVER...

Have I had the misfortune to stumble across such demented ramblings as from the Christians on this forum.
All the God Botherers have gone very quiet indeeed on this topic!

Maybe they have tried the rat poison test at home themselves!

Go on you believers: Try it for yourselves!!
Buy some poison if you have not got any. It is cheap and the results will be well worth it!