Originally posted by Hand of HecateThank heavens, I needed that! I mean, at least it was more uplifting than the Skippers sermon. After reading his I felt like jumping off a bridge. At least after reading yours I thought better of it. Thanks man!
I was not inspired by the Homosexual round #2, however, I'm all about Fire and Brimstone. With no further ado, here is your winning entry as delivered by The Reverend Billy Bob Blackhand, Tulsa, OK, under the tent lights at a wrap up of last Sunday's Summer Fair Revival
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ...[text shortened]... tch-ez.
The Hand.
😴😴😴😴😴
😴😴😀😴😴
😴😀😀😀😴
😴😴😀😴😴
😴😴😀😴😴
😴😴😴😴😴
BTW: I have to admitt that your little "smiley cross" is rather impressive and it will probably win you the contest. I just can't get a break. 😞:'(
Originally posted by whodeyThe smiley cross should not sway the judges in any way. I did feel the spirit of The Right Worthy Reverend Billy Bob Blackhand come over me as I was typing. For whatever reason, I now crave a drink of Kentucky Bourbon and a good steak with baked potato.
Thank heavens, I needed that! I mean, at least it was more uplifting than the Skippers sermon. After reading his I felt like jumping off a bridge. At least after reading yours I thought better of it. Thanks man!
BTW: I have to admitt that your little "smiley cross" is rather impressive and it will probably win you the contest. I just can't get a break. 😞:'(
Originally posted by Hand of HecateNice try Handy. Now do you really expect us to believe the cross would not sway the judges? Well then, perhaps we will blame it on the spirit of Billy Bob Blackhand. Geesh!!
The smiley cross should not sway the judges in any way. I did feel the spirit of The Right Worthy Reverend Billy Bob Blackhand come over me as I was typing. For whatever reason, I now crave a drink of Kentucky Bourbon and a good steak with baked potato.
Edit: I also have trouble in believing the homosexual topic did not interest and inspire you. Especially in light of some of your other posts. Just who is the real Hand of Hecate? You are a mystery man to say the least.
Originally posted by whodeyFaggotry is the work of the Devil. Sodomy should be kept between a man and his sheep as God intended.
Edit: I also have trouble in believing the homosexual topic did not interest and inspire you. Especially in light of some of your other posts. Just who is the real Hand of Hecate? You are a mystery man to say the least.
I really wasn't going to do this, and it isn't addressed at anyone in particular.
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My brothers and sisters, I stand before you shocked and saddened. What happened? When did you get lazy? When did you start believing a bunch of crap? When did you start twisting things so that you could stay in your comfort zones?
Listen to yourselves. How many times have you said “I can't, because...” I can't stay with Mrs. Smith at the hospital because I'll miss Bible study. I can't drive Mr. Ortega to the doctor because that's when my prayer group meets. I can't help the family whose house burned down because I need that money to send my son to church camp. I can't give my kids a bath because taking care of the kids is my wife's job; the Bible says so. I can't send my kids to public school because their minds will be filled with sinful ideas. I can't treat my wife with respect because I'm the head of the household. I can't hug my kids because I'm the disciplinarian. I can't help the poor because I earned what I have; God'll take care of them. How many of you tell yourselves that faith alone will get you into heaven, and you don't need to do good works?
Wake up, people! Your world is too small. Your brain is too small. Jesus would have a cow if he came here right now! Is it better to read a book that you can read at any time, or is it better to put your faith in action by staying with a frightened old woman in the hospital and being the presence of Christ for her? Is it better to hang out with your friends and have coffee and cake and throw in some prayers, or is it better to show Christian love by helping out a neighbor whose car was stolen? And what good is it to send your kid to church camp for a week if your actions teach him that a personal relationship with Christ means being a modern Pharisee? Are you the father of your children, the beloved of your wife? Then get off the couch and help! Are you so distant from your children, so lacking their honor and respect, that their values will come from some other 7-year-old at school instead of from you? Do you think your children and wife respect you if they fear you? Do you think you earned the right to be born in a rich country full of opportunities? Is it not even remotely possible that God wanted to take care of those in need through you? You should be ashamed of yourselves.
In John's account of the last supper (13:14) Jesus says “If I, therefore, the master and teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash one another's feet.” Do you know what that means? It means get off your butts, get out there, and start serving others. Bible study is great – but only if it leads to action. If it prevents you from being of service to others, then it's no different from watching a football game on television. Prayer is good, and communal prayer is great, but if you are praying for things that are contrary to God's will, or you are using prayer as an excuse to make no further effort, then don't bother. You are the hands and feet and heart of Christ. Pick up the phone and call a lonely person. Go visit the homebound. Write letters to the incarcerated. Stop marching in front of abortion clinics and start helping overwhelmed mothers. If Christ is in you, it shouldn't be a secret.
Does this apply to me, too? Of course. We all fail. We all try to take the easy way out. I would much rather call the Ladies' Guild and tell them that Mr. Chang broke his leg and needs some help this week than to go over there myself and be of Christian service. I'm just as ashamed of myself as I am of you. But we can do better. We can be true Christians this week, and when we come back next Sunday, we can really mean it when we sing “They Will Know We Are Christians By Our Love.”
Originally posted by pawnhandlerIf only I had a "rec" left in my bank... 🙁
I really wasn't going to do this, and it isn't addressed at anyone in particular.
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My brothers and sisters, I stand before you shocked and saddened. What happened? When did you get lazy? When did you start believing a bunch of crap? When did you start twisting things so that you could stay in yo ...[text shortened]... y mean it when we sing “They Will Know We Are Christians By Our Love.”
COLORING INSIDE THE LINES
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The pneuma where it wishes blows,
the sound of it you hear, but do not know
whence it comes nor where it goes—
for all who are born of the pneuma, it is so.
The Gospel According to John 3:8*
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When I was a child, we had coloring books with pre-drawn pictures in them, and sets of crayons for coloring-in the pictures. We were taught the importance of coloring inside the lines. I suppose it was good practice for such things as eye-hand coordination. It also taught us to distinguish between the figure and the background. The background itself was defined by the rectangular page; even if I couldn’t keep the colors inside the prescribed (pun intended) lines, it was definitely forbidden to color outside the page—on the carpet, for example!
Early on, failure to keep within the lines—or even the boundaries of the page—was assumed to be due to inability. Lessons and explanations were offered. At some point, however, it was assumed that such failure was due to carelessness or disregard: disrespect for the boundaries and what lay outside them. Coloring outside the lines might bring a mild rebuke—“You know better than that.” Coloring off the page could bring not only rebuke, but punishment—“How many times have I told you to be careful! You’re going to ruin the carpet! Give me the crayons and go to your room! You can have them back when you learn to be more careful!”
One day, I learned a trick: I would draw new lines on the page with a black crayon (I still thought all the lines had to be black). Then I would color inside those lines. I learned that I could expand the pictures in the coloring book in many, many creative ways. And still color inside the lines! (And if the page was not big enough, I would tape several pages together—which not only solved the carpet-problem by expanding the ground, but added new creative dimensions as I connected whole pre-drawn pictures with my own lines.)
I never learned to let go of those fundamental “artistic” rules: lines must be clearly drawn and rigorously respected when coloring. (No Jackson Pollock, I!) Perhaps that’s why I was eventually told that I had no artistic talent—that, and the fact that I couldn’t really draw very well either.
All that is, of course, a parable. My religious education followed a similar pattern. I learned that there were clearly prescribed (pun, again, intended) beliefs, and that the colors of one’s thoughts had to be kept inside the lines. I learned that creating new pictures by drawing new lines was at best heterodoxy; worse, heresy; worst, apostasy.
Early on, failure to keep within the lines—or even the boundaries of the page—was assumed to be due to inability, or lack of proper understanding. At some point, however, it was assumed that such failure was due to carelessness or disregard—or rebellion. That’s where the fire and brimstone started to come into play. One must be terrorized into staying inside the lines, and ostracized if he still refuses.
I hear the message often: if you do not believe right, you don’t have the Holy Spirit (or some other terminology in some other religion). The Holy Spirit dwells only inside the lines of right belief. If you knew the Holy Spirit, you’d color inside the lines. And if you don’t, your soul is condemned to everlasting hell, to the lake of fire! (When you're little, you get sent to your room; when you're big, you get sent to hell.)
Well, the verse quoted from the Gospel of John says that the Spirit blows where it wishes, where it will, regardless of the lines drawn by people in books or creeds. Of course, one can attempt to draw lines around that verse by using other verses to con-texualize it (there’s a pun in that hyphen, too). But I think that goes against the whole point of Jesus’ statement here: that the Spirit will not be told to color inside your lines!
There is a paradox here. And the paradox is that the Spirit is the artist and the ground, from which and in which she travels, crayons in hand, coloring as she will. For her, there is no carpet off the page. Like Jackson Pollock, she paints without first drawing lines—and perhaps, like Pollock, there are mysterious fractals to be found in her painting.
Fire and brimstone? All too often, the desperate reaction of those who fear that—since their salvation was found inside a given set of lines—if the lines are not tightly kept, their salvation might be in question. It is not their salvation that the freely-blowing Spirit threatens, but the limits and conditions of their faith.
But the secret is not that one should color outside the lines. The secret is to trust the faithfulness of a Spirit that knows no graven lines; and to learn to color like she does...
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* pneuma can properly be translated as spirit, wind, breath—even, following the Stoics, wind-fire.
Revelation 20:15
And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire.
As I sit here looking out the window, I can see the sun setting. It's a ball of fire. It burns with incredible heat and energy.
I've sometimes wondered what it would be like to fall into it.
In the passage that I took this verse from, is described a scene where the unsaved dead are brought before the throne of God, and judged according to their works. Not much is said about those works, or what those works were. But it seems that those works have to do with sin. Maybe the degree of punishment corresponds to the amount of sin that was committed. It doesn't seem to make much difference.
I'm wondering if those being judged are brought before the throne in a body like the one we have now, or maybe it's just the soul. When Jesus told the story about the rich man and Lazarus, the rich man declared to Abraham that he was "tormented in this flame". Notice he didn't say "by" this flame, but, "in" this flame. It seems to me that if one is cast into the lake of fire in their body, the body will just burn up in a matter of a seconds, and all one would be left with is their soul. A soul doesn't appear to have nerve endings, so I don't think a person has to worry too much about physical pain.
I've heard it said that it is pitch black inside of a fire. I heard that from a fireman. So, I think the lake of fire is a very lonely place. Like outer darkness. Didn't Jesus say that, and something about weeping and gnashing of teeth. What a terrible thing to find ones self before the throne of a Holy God being judged for unbelief. I believe unbelief is the worst thing a person can do.
Certainly for those who didn't believe, when they found themselves there before God, will be unable to give an answer. Especially after hearing about Jesus all their lives, and rejecting the story as just a myth or fable.
I've tried to imagine being judged and then thrown into a lake of fire. It's really too frightening isn't it?
But I believe God, and I take him at his word. And so I know when that time comes, I will be there, not as one being judged, but as one who has eternal life. I've wondered too if I will see people I had know, or loved, or had tried to persuade being judged and then cast into that lake of fire. How will I feel? What will I be thinking? Will I care?
I care now. It grieves me to no end to think of anyone spending eternity in a lonely, loveless, Godless existence.
Don't make the mistake of not trusting God. You will regret it for all eternity.