Why not put up a poll asking whether tournament TOs should be automatic? We can leave non-tournament games as is. I often let TOs slide for people I know and would prefer it that way.
Would be interesting to see if people would be more or less likely to enter a tournament if TOs were enforced.
Based on majority rule (>50% or >75😵, implement it. Put a note on the signup page for new tournaments. No exceptions - vacations or otherwise (harsh, I know.)
Won't quite all the discussions, but would reflect the will of the players and the intent of the TOs.