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Culture Forum

  1. Standard member ChronicLeaky
    Don't Fear Me
    18 Jan '09 16:45 / 1 edit
    Friends, Romans, countrymen, etc, listen here!

    The votes are all in and it is time to announce the winners of the 2009 RHP VERSE COMPETITION, that they may be covered with the most viscous of glory. I must stress the very high standard of verse in this competition, in my opinion the finest verse in any RHP VERSE COMPETITION thus far. I also commend the Versificating Public on their abstinence from plagiarism

    There is a very wide range of form and content in this competition's entries, and therefore voting entailed comparison of a much more taxonomically diverse pile of things than any mixed assortment of apples and oranges. Therefore those who voted also deserve praise for bringing this competition to, erm, fruition.

    Without further ado, the hopefully frugivorous winners and their (admittedly metaphorical, but they're poets) fruity prizes:

    In third place, with 8 [weighted] votes, for which he shall receive an exquisitely ripened watermelon the size of yo' mama, for the entry The Wood of Humanity, The Reverend kirksey957.

    In second place, with 9, for which she shall receive the Pomegranate of Morbidity, plucked straight from the deceptive hands of Hades himself, for the entry Walter's Perfect [Unmentionable], SJ247 and her wonderfully twisted psyche.

    In first place, with 11, we have an impressive tie. Hence:

    In the spirit of rainy autumnal snow-anticipation, here is an entire bog of tart and generally wintrily tempestuous cranberries -- bringers of the sauce -- for the entry Tuesday Afternoon, from pawnhandler, who is as adept with pen as with pawn.

    I'm not sure the titular flower of our next winner's entry is edible, so I have turned to Wikipedia, and discovered that said flower is related to the baobab tree, with it's Exuperian literary weight and fruit which is apparently super-high in Vitamin C. For the entry Hibiscus, Sunburnt gets a baobab tree and whatever fruit it happens to grow.

    Last is not least, in announcements of victory or in submitting verses. Our final winner is a man of puddling proclivities -- also puns. I mean, "guiltless soles"? This is fruity in the most praise-piled sense of the word. Such sharp language call to mind the dragon fruit, a decidedly pink and delicious cactus appendage. So that he may enjoy the prickly goodness, for his entry Untitled, catfoodtim will have such a cactus planted in his honour, in his bedroom.

    Congratulations to those who won, and many thanks to all who entered and voted.

    At this point, it would be excellent if discussion or criticism of the poems would commence. I have left anonymous the authors of those entries which didn't get fruit thrown at them, but if anyone wants to say what they wrote, I am sure people will be intrigued and generally in the mood for fruitful literary dialogue.



    (Fine print: Note that votes were counted if and only if they adhered to the voting rules. In particular, DoctorScribbles and Ludovician did not vote, since they didn't specify a ranking and title (Ludovician) or a vote at all (Dr. S), and declined to clarify their votes when asked. I'm sorry to have to mention this on this celebratory occasion, but I fear that otherwise there will be heinous arguments.)
  2. 18 Jan '09 17:50
    Congratulations to all the winners! Hibiscus makes a good tisane, by the way.

    I hope those who didn't win will speak up and tell us which poem they wrote, too. Naturally I am especially curious about the non-winning poems I voted for (Belgrade 1999 and Forest).
  3. Standard member ChronicLeaky
    Don't Fear Me
    18 Jan '09 17:54
    I'm guilty of "The Blanket out of Time and Space".
  4. 18 Jan '09 18:38 / 1 edit
    Originally posted by ChronicLeaky
    I'm guilty of "The Blanket out of Time and Space".
    I suspected that was you. You have a distinctive voice. 🙂

    And congratulations to the winners!
  5. Standard member ChronicLeaky
    Don't Fear Me
    18 Jan '09 18:58 / 1 edit
    I am denser than the densest fruitcake 😞.

    I must apologize profusely to Catfoodtim. I failed to obey my own voting rules: I misread Noodles' votes, swapping 1st and 3rd place (i.e. I read "1" as "first place" etc as appears in other posts). The effect this has is to break part of the tie, giving Catfoodtim 13 votes, not 11.

    However, I can't in good conscience rescind anyone's fruits. Instead, I would like to take the opportunity to award CFT and "Untitled" an additional bushel of mangoes, 14 kilos of Faith Spermaceti and my firstborn child's soul, should such a thing ever exist, as well as the title of MEISTER OF THE DANCE.
  6. 18 Jan '09 19:44
    Originally posted by ChronicLeaky
    (Fine print: Note that votes were counted if and only if they adhered to the voting rules. In particular, DoctorScribbles and Ludovician did not vote, since they didn't specify a ranking and title (Ludovician) or a vote at all (Dr. S), and declined to clarify their votes when asked. I'm sorry to have to mention this on this celebratory occasion, but I fear that otherwise there will be heinous arguments.)
    😛
  7. Standard member ChronicLeaky
    Don't Fear Me
    18 Jan '09 19:54
    The post that was quoted here has been removed
    Word. I shall change my location accordingly. I'm not sure if you should change yours to "MOD", though.
  8. Standard member Sunburnt
    Leopard Girl
    18 Jan '09 19:59
    Good job to all. This was a hard vote for me. I changed it a few times. I was glad to know I was right about my guesses on some authors.

    Really great!
  9. Standard member ChronicLeaky
    Don't Fear Me
    18 Jan '09 19:59
    Since I'm into motivation and inspiration, I wonder if any authors would like to discuss the motivations/inspirations behind their work. To what, if any, experiences or abstractions or whatever are you giving voice in your work? Do you know why these stood out enough in your mind to be chosen as the topic of poetry?
  10. 18 Jan '09 20:13
    Originally posted by ChronicLeaky
    Since I'm into motivation and inspiration, I wonder if any authors would like to discuss the motivations/inspirations behind their work. To what, if any, experiences or abstractions or whatever are you giving voice in your work? Do you know why these stood out enough in your mind to be chosen as the topic of poetry?
    I'm afraid I wrote my other entry right after reading Twilight.
  11. Donation kirksey957
    Outkast
    18 Jan '09 22:48 / 1 edit
    I was disappointed my racist rant "Through a Glass Darkly" did not do better, so as I could dedicate it to Red Night on the eve of Obama's inauguration.

    Nevertheless, thanks for the watermelon. Bitches.
  12. 18 Jan '09 23:04
    Originally posted by ChronicLeaky
    Since I'm into motivation and inspiration, I wonder if any authors would like to discuss the motivations/inspirations behind their work. To what, if any, experiences or abstractions or whatever are you giving voice in your work? Do you know why these stood out enough in your mind to be chosen as the topic of poetry?
    Mine flowed like hot oil, after I woke from a nightmare about one of my kids. The nightmare content was totally unrelated, but as ugly as the feeling in my writing. The subject of my "poem" was tucked away in my mind, from a conversation I had years ago with an ex lover. Pillow talk, of sorts. Very demented pillow talk.

    I don't write often. When I do, I can't resist the urge to make it rhyme. In this case, I think the rhyming makes it even creepier.

    I enjoy that in most cases it repulses the reader. I figure the more extreme the emotion drawn, the better, and that the emotion doesn't have to be happy and positive to make the writing worthwhile.

    I enjoyed the competition, but was sorry to see two of my first place votes discounted. Frankly, that sucked.

    Congratulations to all.
  13. Donation kirksey957
    Outkast
    18 Jan '09 23:13
    Originally posted by ChronicLeaky
    Since I'm into motivation and inspiration, I wonder if any authors would like to discuss the motivations/inspirations behind their work. To what, if any, experiences or abstractions or whatever are you giving voice in your work? Do you know why these stood out enough in your mind to be chosen as the topic of poetry?
    The two Obama girls are the ones in "Through a Glass Darkly". The historical reference was to the Birmingham church bombing in the '60s. I just felt it was a timely poem to juxtapose the two experiences of the bombing and Obama's inauguration. Like SJ, it was like hot oil for me too.
  14. 19 Jan '09 00:29
    Originally posted by Nordlys
    Congratulations to all the winners! Hibiscus makes a good tisane, by the way.

    I hope those who didn't win will speak up and tell us which poem they wrote, too. Naturally I am especially curious about the non-winning poems I voted for (Belgrade 1999 and Forest).
    I wrote Belgrade 1999 and The beggar, both back in 1999. At that time Belgrade was in the process of being bombed to hell and was all over the papers.
    The beggar was based on someone who used to sit with his dog and a plastic cup in the same place in Manchester all day and every day. People always avoided looking at him as they walked past and stock answers when you ask people are, "He probably asked for it" or "He's probably got a stash of money somewhere".
    I'm glad both the poems got some votes!
  15. 19 Jan '09 00:46
    Originally posted by davejacks
    I wrote Belgrade 1999 and The beggar, both back in 1999. At that time Belgrade was in the process of being bombed to hell and was all over the papers.
    The beggar was based on someone who used to sit with his dog and a plastic cup in the same place in Manchester all day and every day. People always avoided looking at him as they walked past and stock ans ...[text shortened]... r "He's probably got a stash of money somewhere".
    I'm glad both the poems got some votes!
    Nicely done! I almost voted for The Beggar, too.