26 Mar 05
Originally posted by lucifershammerHow would we know? You never posted any "thought". Peter Jennings is a canadian who hates the US.
21,320 - Number of foreign children adopted by US couples in 2003 (Source: World News Tonight with Peter Jennings; ABC)
Are US orphanages suddenly short of babies?
So?
Post a thought to consider.
26 Mar 05
Originally posted by StarValleyWyVery well. Since "unwanted orphans languishing in the system" has been raised as an argument in favour of adoption by same-sex couples, I would like to know how advocates of that argument react to a statistic that suggests that around 20,000 couples (mostly different-sex, no doubt) are looking abroad for adoption.
How would we know? You never posted any "thought". Peter Jennings is a canadian who hates the US.
So?
Post a thought to consider.
26 Mar 05
Originally posted by lucifershammerI think it's fairly common for "1st world" countries to be net importers of babies for adobtion from "3rd world" countries.
21,320 - Number of foreign children adopted by US couples in 2003 (Source: World News Tonight with Peter Jennings; ABC)
Are US orphanages suddenly short of babies?
It's a consequence of 3 factors : 2 unfortunate ones and one fortunate.
1. A number of couples in the western world can not have children of their own. They desperately wants to adobt.
2. A number of couples in the 3rd world can not support their children, or dies leaving their children to relatives that can not support them.
3. Only a very small number of couples in the western world have to give their children away for adobtion (for what ever reason).
26 Mar 05
Originally posted by ScheelI agree entirely. Thanks. You say it as well and better than I could have.
I think it's fairly common for "1st world" countries to be net importers of babies for adobtion from "3rd world" countries.
It's a consequence of 3 factors : 2 unfortunate ones and one fortunate.
1. A number of couples in the western world can not have children of their own. They desperately wants to adobt.
2. A number of couples in the 3rd world ...[text shortened]... ples in the western world have to give their children away for adobtion (for what ever reason).
26 Mar 05
Originally posted by ScheelAre you implying that there is, in fact, a shortage of children up for adoption in the US (follows from your #3)?
I think it's fairly common for "1st world" countries to be net importers of babies for adobtion from "3rd world" countries.
It's a consequence of 3 factors : 2 unfortunate ones and one fortunate.
1. A number of couples in the western world can not have children of their own. They desperately wants to adobt.
2. A number of couples in the 3rd world ...[text shortened]... ples in the western world have to give their children away for adobtion (for what ever reason).
26 Mar 05
Originally posted by lucifershammerPeople who adopt outside the US also don't have to worry about the biological parents reclaiming their offspring after a few years as they do after adopting babies in the US. I wouldn't adopt in the US for that reason alone unless I could be guaranteed complete nontraceable anonymity from the biological parent....
21,320 - Number of foreign children adopted by US couples in 2003 (Source: World News Tonight with Peter Jennings; ABC)
Are US orphanages suddenly short of babies?
26 Mar 05
2 edits
Originally posted by chancremechanicYou don't get out much do you?
People who adopt outside the US also don't have to worry about the biological parents reclaiming their offspring after a few years as they do after adopting babies in the US. I wouldn't adopt in the US for that reason alone unles ...[text shortened]... eed complete nontraceable anonymity from the biological parent....
There are no fewer than twenty thousand cases of people who have learned to "sell" their kids and SELL the right of "suing" to american lawyers.
20,000 ain't much... (See Dateline, PBS, Adoptions Gone Awry)
Unless you are one of those who pay 30 grand and bring a kid from indonesia only to find out that an american scum sucking lawyer arranged it so he can sue "for the mother".
26 Mar 05
Actually, yes.
Most people want to adopt babies. Most of the kids available for adoption (approx. 100,000) are on average 8-9 years old.
If you choose an older child, you get that childs history and if things were bad enough for a parent's rights terminated, it was bad and lasted a while.
I know of only one couple that took on older kids, they adopted a sibling pair. They have had quite a roller coaster ride as they have tried to deal with the kids' past.
26 Mar 05
Originally posted by AynatHi Aynat,
Actually, yes.
Most people want to adopt babies. Most of the kids available for adoption (approx. 100,000) are on average 8-9 years old.
If you choose an older child, you get that childs history and if things were bad enough for a parent's rights terminated, it was bad and lasted a while.
I know of only one couple that took on older kids, they adop ...[text shortened]... They have had quite a roller coaster ride as they have tried to deal with the kids' past.
I have thought of taking on the job of adopting older kids when my daughter and my grandkids move out.
I don't know if I have the energy. But my wife and I have talked. She wants to do SOMETHING. She is only 52 though. I feel at a loss. God give me the energy should she follow up and actually do the deed.
You ask why I am so fatalistic? Because my wife is the ruler here. I have learned how to say "Yes Dear" and that's about it. In 33 years of marriage. God save my tired old bones.
26 Mar 05
2 edits
Originally posted by StarValleyWyThink about foster care. There are so many kids who end up in foster care for the long haul (while parents sort themselves out) and end up moved about endlessly.
I have thought of taking on the job of adopting older kids when my daughter and my grandkids move out.
While you are thinking...do some research. Learn about kids and trauma. Lundy Bancroft wrote an excellent book on helping kids heal from domestic violence which has loads of concrete suggetions for helping kids work through it and handling the adventure while they do it! It is called, "When Dad Hurts Mom".
Did you know that Big Brothers/Big Sisters and Something called Children of Incarcerated Parents? Both have mentoring programs which target children who have a parent in jail? These kids need lots of support as well.
There may even be a daycare/school that specializes in high risk/needs kids/homeless kids that could use a caring extra adult to provide love and stability. I am an "Auntie" at one in my area.
When I get done with my work for money (would it surprise you to learn that I work with victims of domestic abuse and sexual assualt), I may start doing foster care.
26 Mar 05
Originally posted by AynatI think my wife and I both fear that we might not be able to detach from the kids if we must.
Think about foster care. There are so many kids who end up in foster care for the long haul (while parents sort themselves out) and end up moved about endlessly.
While you are thinking...do some research. Learn about kids and trauma. Lundy Bancroft wrote an excellent book on helping kids heal from domestic violence which has loads of concrete suggetions fo ...[text shortened]... n that I work with victims of domestic abuse and sexual assualt), I may start doing foster care.
My wife would do better than I. I really can't imagine coming to love a kid and just walking away when the law said I must.
That ain't the way I'm built. I will love and love strongly. But I won't pretend.
Any kid that comes into my home would HAVE TO BE a child of mine.
I can't help it. I see kids who are without a parent and it breaks my heart.
No. Better we never get involved. It hurts too much to think of losing a child.
26 Mar 05
Originally posted by StarValleyWyThere was a time I would have agreed with you...I have no desire for more pain...
No. Better we never get involved. It hurts too much to think of losing a child.[/b]
Consider this: Some kids live in choas and filth, surround by self-absorbed insane people who are not capable of providing the most basic of things: a clean house, clothing for the climate and season, decent food, basic supervision or a little affection.
As I write, I keep hearing a 12-year old boy who was really excited telling me about the foster home he had been living in for several months. He had his "own" bed and he got to pick the sheets and blankets and he could always find his toothbrush. There was a yard, and a dog and he went to school every day and everyday his foster mom remembered to pick him up!
This kid most likely will not be placed with the foster family for adoption because the kids are Native American and the family is white. Under the Indian Child Welfare Act, active efforts must be made to keep the child within his/her culture so if a Native American family comes forward to adopt or foster the child the current family will lose them. But, in the meantime, those kids have a taste of a decent life and a loving family and maybe even experienced some healing....
Just a thought....