Another op-ed parody about Florida

Clearly, Florida on point about math textbooks being woke indoctrination manuals

From the Lexington Herald-Leader
Lexington, KY
By Roger Guffey
Updated April 29, 2022 10:12 AM

https://www.kentucky.com/opinion/op-ed/article260890577.html

Florida recently rejected dozens of mathematics textbooks proposed for adoption in the state schools because the books contained objectionable material designed to indoctrinate students with liberal ideologies. Governor Ron DeSantis deserves the medal of honor for standing up to these woke bullies who have pushed their subversive materials on an unsuspecting public.

I have done my own research online. The dangerous indoctrination begins as early as kindergarten because students are forced to use Arabic numbers. If Roman numerals were good enough for Jesus, they are good enough for me. Be honest: Doesn’t LXXXIX + CXLVIII = CCXXXVII make as much sense as anything you learned in algebra?

Algebra, the bane of teenagers everywhere, is an Arabic word “al-jabr” meaning the reunion of broken parts. Math is about numbers, not letters. The insidious algebra deals in axions, definitions and properties that expose their true purpose. The average American has no idea of the evils lurking in these disguises. One of basic properties is that zero is the additive identity element. Once students have accepted this additive identity element how long before they are seduced into talking about gender identity?

Flagrant anti-American ideology lurks among these properties our impressionable students are forced to learn to pass the class. One of the first properties they learn is the commutative property. Is it just a coincidence that the word commutative shares most of its letters with communism? The associative property is clear reference to creeping socialism. The distributive property obviously alludes to the socialist dream of redistribution of wealth amassed by hard working capitalists.

The situation worsens in algebra two and geometry. What the heck are imaginary numbers and irrational numbers? Don’t students struggle enough with real numbers? If the purpose of education is to teach rational thinking, why do we even have irrational numbers? Pi, the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter is supposedly an irrational number approximately equal to 3.14. This is clearly a heresy against the Christian faith because the Bible unequivocally states in I Kings 7:23 and II Chronicles 4:2 that the ratio of the circumference of a circular kettle to its diameter is exactly three. The deviants teaching our kids math are unashamedly corrupting our children by implying that the Bible is wrong. Our precious children have to make a hard choice: accepting the secular definition of pi or risk condemning their eternal souls to eternal damnation.

These unholy teachings occur in every branch of math, but one of the most difficult ideas is logarithms. John Napier discovered logarithms, or “Napier’s Bones” in 1614. Napier was accused of being in league with the devil because he danced naked in the moonlight and wrote dozens of anti-papalist tracts. Some cautionary observers have suggested that the word logarithm could also be a euphemism for birth control for people in the timber industry. Can endorsement of abortion be far behind once contraception enters the picture?

But the worst offenders in this secular humanistic world of mathematics is the hell-spawn of fractions. How many sleepless nights students have endured trying to master the black arts of calculations using fractions. For example, teachers claim that ½ + ¼ = ¾ when even a blind man can see the correct answer is 2/6 which “reduces” to 1/3. In what world does that make sense?

In the 1980’s the restaurant franchise A & W tried to pull off a fast one on its customers. They offered a one third pound hamburger to compete with McDonald’s quarter pounder for the same price. Their new burger experiment failed miserably because customers knew the McDonald’s burger was bigger because 4 is greater than 3. Who did A&W think they were fooling?

Research has shown that math anxiety is correlated with higher rates of suicide, depression, and mental illness all of which are also related to the LQBTQ crowd. Which came first: the chicken or the egg? Who are these miscreants? LQBTQ is not even a word. God created male and female, namely Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. Outlawing saying ‘gay’ will save lives because will not be confused by false teachings.

Don’t misinterpret me. I am as open-minded as the next person because there are two things I hate: prejudice and non-Christians. I am all for equality for all as long as Christians have more equality than others. We need to put God back into our schools and perverts back in the closet.

Pi are squared. No, cake are squared, Pi are round

@Earl-of-Trumps
If they make 6 year old children compute PI to 100 decimal places, I'll complain.

The epigram you posted or whatever you'd call it is not a parody or lampoon of what is happening in Florida, it's just a lot of stuupid weirdo overbolown scenarios that the writer attributes to You-Know-Who....Trump...Republicans....etc...

@jj-adams said
The epigram you posted or whatever you'd call it is not a parody or lampoon of what is happening in Florida, it's just a lot of stuupid weirdo overbolown scenarios that the writer attributes to You-Know-Who....Trump...Republicans....etc...

@suzianne said
Clearly, Florida on point about math textbooks being woke indoctrination manuals

From the Lexington Herald-Leader
Lexington, KY
By Roger Guffey
Updated April 29, 2022 10:12 AM

https://www.kentucky.com/opinion/op-ed/article260890577.html

Florida recently rejected dozens of mathematics textbooks proposed for adoption in the state schools because the books containe ...[text shortened]... more equality than others. We need to put God back into our schools and perverts back in the closet.

@kevcvs57 said
“ I have done my own research online. The dangerous indoctrination begins as early as kindergarten because students are forced to use Arabic numbers. If Roman numerals were good enough for Jesus, they are good enough for me. Be honest: Doesn’t LXXXIX + CXLVIII = CCXXXVII make as much sense as anything you learned in algebra? ”
Your doomed I tell ya. Doomed. 😂😂

@earl-of-trumps said
I thought it was classic, myself. 😆 😆

The reality is, I don't suspect many of today's math students could calculate that problem.