If you attend the University Of Wisconsin then it seems like a very worthwhile effort.
If you are not a student there then I recommend dancing with tigers in Bengal. Sneak up on them and grab them by the tail and have a merry old time.
If you absolutely have to kiss a badger, you might as well use tongue. That will give you an excuse for the rest of your life, explaining why it is that you can't speak, but can only make grunting sounds.