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The Engagement Ring

The Engagement Ring

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AThousandYoung
1st Dan TKD Kukkiwon

tinyurl.com/2te6yzdu

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Boy meets Girl. Boy and Girl develop a serious, multi year relationship. Boy proposes to Girl. Boy gives Girl the Ring.

Girl later alienates Boy via personality conflicts. Boy dumps Girl, who was living with him, and gets a restraining order put on her because he claims she wont leave him alone.

Is Girl supposed to give the Ring back to Boy?

Wajoma
Die Cheeseburger

Provocation

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Take it to the "Help" forum spanky.

w

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
Boy meets Girl. Boy and Girl develop a serious, multi year relationship. Boy proposes to Girl. Boy gives Girl the Ring.

Girl later alienates Boy via personality conflicts. Boy dumps Girl, who was living with him, and gets a restraining order put on her because he claims she wont leave him alone.

Is Girl supposed to give the Ring back to Boy?
Just pay someone to sneak in her house and take it back. Then head to the nearest pawn shop. 😛

Of course, if you get caught this conversation never took place!! 😠

e

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
Boy meets Girl. Boy and Girl develop a serious, multi year relationship. Boy proposes to Girl. Boy gives Girl the Ring.

Girl later alienates Boy via personality conflicts. Boy dumps Girl, who was living with him, and gets a restraining order put on her because he claims she wont leave him alone.

Is Girl supposed to give the Ring back to Boy?
Morally and rationally, yes. Realistically and emotionally... good luck on that one.

AThousandYoung
1st Dan TKD Kukkiwon

tinyurl.com/2te6yzdu

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Originally posted by Wajoma
Take it to the "Help" forum spanky.
I don't need help, I'm just curious. It's actually my ex-girlfriend who got dumped by her fiance and kept the ring.

Wajoma
Die Cheeseburger

Provocation

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
I don't need help, I'm just curious. It's actually my ex-girlfriend who got dumped by her fiance and kept the ring.
Sometimes that is the first step, like alcoholics, the first step is to realise that you do need help, psychiatric help, aided by some powerful psycho active drugs.

twhitehead

Cape Town

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
Is Girl supposed to give the Ring back to Boy?
There is no general rule. Also, the rules would be different depending on what is more important, the emotional value of the ring or the cost.
In general, if you give a girl something of monetary value during a relationship, with no expectation that it will be returned, then it is hers to keep regardless of whether you break up or not.
If however it is a symbol of a promise then that might be a different matter. However, if the boyfriend just wants it back so he can pawn it, then the girl should keep it.

F

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
Is Girl supposed to give the Ring back to Boy?
A few Indonesians I posed this question to this morning sucked through their teeth a little before coming more or less to a consensus that she SHOULD give the ring back but doesn't HAVE to.

F

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
Boy meets Girl. Boy and Girl develop a serious, multi year relationship. Boy proposes to Girl. Boy gives Girl the Ring.

Girl later alienates Boy via personality conflicts. Boy dumps Girl, who was living with him, and gets a restraining order put on her because he claims she wont leave him alone.

Is Girl supposed to give the Ring back to Boy?
I think it's a matter of who dumps who.

If boy dumps girl, then boy cannot expect to get anything back.
If girl dumps boy, then girl should return every gift boy wants.

And it's also a matter of reason for the dump.

If boy dumps girl because girl humps another boy, then girl should return ring.
If girl dumps boy because boy humps another boy, then girl keeps what girl have.

P
Upward Spiral

Halfway

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
Boy meets Girl. Boy and Girl develop a serious, multi year relationship. Boy proposes to Girl. Boy gives Girl the Ring.

Girl later alienates Boy via personality conflicts. Boy dumps Girl, who was living with him, and gets a restraining order put on her because he claims she wont leave him alone.

Is Girl supposed to give the Ring back to Boy?[/b]
Highlighted the key word for you.

M

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
Boy meets Girl. Boy and Girl develop a serious, multi year relationship. Boy proposes to Girl. Boy gives Girl the Ring.

Girl later alienates Boy via personality conflicts. Boy dumps Girl, who was living with him, and gets a restraining order put on her because he claims she wont leave him alone.

Is Girl supposed to give the Ring back to Boy?
Both should sign a contract stating that if the relationship breaks up, the ring will immediately be sold and the proceeds will be donated to a charity they both agree on in advance.

kmax87
Republicant Retiree

Blade Runner

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
Boy meets Girl. Boy and Girl develop a serious, multi year relationship. Boy proposes to Girl. Boy gives Girl the Ring.

Girl later alienates Boy via personality conflicts. Boy dumps Girl, who was living with him, and gets a restraining order put on her because he claims she wont leave him alone.

Is Girl supposed to give the Ring back to Boy?
I think it depends on whether there was a sentimental value attached to the ring. If it was a family heirloom with the expectation that it would only be 'given' to the girl that would marry into 'his' family (😀- its all about the guy remember, I mean she drops her name and all), then if he was the dumpee I think he should be entitled to get the ring back.

The point is that all of these expectations were forged during an era when manners and traditions meant something. No self respecting women who broke off an 'engagement' in the past would ever of thought twice of keeping the ring. In fact the ring being returned(thrown back) was often the official sign that you were dumped.

If that level of etiquette is absent, then good luck!

F

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Originally posted by Palynka
Highlighted the key word for you.
"Boy gives Girl the Ring."

I understand what it says.
But I don't think girl accepts ring if boy only lends it to girl.

If the OP really means "gives" when he writes "gives", then there wouldn't be any interesting answers, would it?

What symbolize the ring for you in this context, Palynka? Only a gift or perhaps something deeper?

F

Unknown Territories

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Originally posted by FabianFnas
"Boy [b]gives Girl the Ring."

I understand what it says.
But I don't think girl accepts ring if boy only lends it to girl.

If the OP really means "gives" when he writes "gives", then there wouldn't be any interesting answers, would it?

What symbolize the ring for you in this context, Palynka? Only a gift or perhaps something deeper?[/b]
The 'give' in this case is a token of the promise. The promise now broken, the symbol which represented it ought to return to its pre-promise owner. She could sue him for his breach of contract, and this has been done previously.

Most women end up keeping the ring in cases like this (as far as I have heard), and it seems to me they do so out of spite more than any emotional attachment otherwise.

sh76
Civis Americanus Sum

New York

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Originally posted by AThousandYoung
Boy meets Girl. Boy and Girl develop a serious, multi year relationship. Boy proposes to Girl. Boy gives Girl the Ring.

Girl later alienates Boy via personality conflicts. Boy dumps Girl, who was living with him, and gets a restraining order put on her because he claims she wont leave him alone.

Is Girl supposed to give the Ring back to Boy?
There's actually plenty of case law on that question.

Long story short, the answer is generally yes. If an engagement breaks off, an engagement ring generally must be returned because it was a conditional gift.

Gill v. Shively, 320 So. 2d 415 (FL 1975)

Priebe v. Sinclair, 90 Cal. App. 2d 79 (Cal App 1949)

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