A stoat just drilled a hole in my brain

A thread of handy explanations for really poor chess moves.

My cleaner was dusting my desk and saw that my computer was logged onto RHP. She decided to make a few moves but is hopeless at tactics and miscalculated.

nessie in my coffee

@relentless-red said
A thread of handy explanations for really poor chess moves.

@The-Gravedigger
Is that her name? Miss calculator?

Didn't realise it was only eight squares wide, we're decimal in the UK.

@Relentless-Red
Ah, those missing squares must be a bitch to calculate🙂

too many decibels

I didn't allow for the slope.

@sonhouse said
@The-Gravedigger
Is that her name? Miss calculator?

...I'm just a poor player...

I was practicing with a cheese board.

Years back I was logged in, I was wondering what to do, I went to the bathroom. When I got back my cat was playing with the mouse, naturally lol
But the little gremlin somehow had clicked a move. I was disgusted so I resigned. My opponent messaged me asking why I resigned because my move was brilliant
I just said I know it was a great move, I'mma quitting chess.