@very-rusty saidThe same as with women. We do what we must and hopefully it pleases us doing so. Nowadays, in our culture, men and women often share financial responsibilities for the good of the family and themselves of course.
I believe that a man should be there for his children and wife and always show them love and support. "A man's got to do what man's got to do", is an expression that has been around for years. Said to mean that you will do whatever you have to do, even if it is difficult or dangerous. Your family comes before yourself.
-VR
@torunn saidI don't think anybody reaches a point of knowing absolutely which expectations come from within and which come from outside. I don't think they know whether the ones coming from within were archetypal with an inevitable starting point that could only be shaped or whether they were introduced at some point in their journey.
There seem to be certain expectations of men that I don't quite understand. If there is a conflict between a man and a woman it should be between individuals - not their roles.
An interesting question is how much are women involved in the creation and management of the expectations?
@torunn saidBeing tough when the situation calls for it, stepping up to tackle hardships or frightening situations, etc. Nothing you probably haven't heard before.
What is it like being a man? "Be a man", we hear as to encourage men to be a certain way. "A man's got to do what a man's got to do." As a woman, I can't help wondering: what is it like being a man? What do men feel is expected of them other than just being human?
I've noticed: if a couple lives in a dirty house, people tend to blame the woman. If a couple can't pay their bills, people tend to blame the man. It doesn't matter if both are making the same amount of money or not. This is for obvious reasons.
In short, men are supposed to be as close to being Batman as possible.
@relentless-red saidA good question. Personally I would expect a man to be loyal above all - nothing particularly manly about that. We would share our money and responsibilities between us. He would prioritize his family. Nothing very manly about that.
I don't think anybody reaches a point of knowing absolutely which expectations come from within and which come from outside. I don't think they know whether the ones coming from within were archetypal with an inevitable starting point that could only be shaped or whether they were introduced at some point in their journey.
An interesting question is how much are women involved in the creation and management of the expectations?
@torunn saidDoes that shape men not to be like that if women say that those are not very manly qualities? Perhaps the majority of men most want to appear manly in the eyes of women?
A good question. Personally I would expect a man to be loyal above all - nothing particularly manly about that. We would share our money and responsibilities between us. He would prioritize his family. Nothing very manly about that.
@relentless-red saidMaybe. Maybe women don't need men to be very manly, just individuals with strong integrity.
Does that shape men not to be like that if women say that those are not very manly qualities? Perhaps the majority of men most want to appear manly in the eyes of women?
@torunn saidI believe manly means having courage and strength. Correct me if I am wrong but would a woman not want a man to have both of these qualities? Integrity of course would be up there on the list for sure!
Maybe. Maybe women don't need men to be very manly, just individuals with strong integrity.
-VR
@relentless-red saidMaybe we are on our way - very slowly.
Maybe you can have it both ways by developing a culture in which integrity is seen as a manly quality. Perhaps it is about the culture that men and women create.