General Forum

General Forum

  1. Subscribermoonbus
    Uber-Nerd
    Joined
    31 May '12
    Moves
    2490
    05 Oct '15 16:33
    Originally posted by Seitse
    Done that.

    When I played football, the line tapes two and two to avoid injuries.
    I felt it gave me a better grip when holding and knocking down
    opponents.
    Oh well then, it sounds like you're primed for the big experiment. Which digit do you propose to disengage? How (meat cleaver?)? And would you consider presenting the severed member to Smithsonian Institution or Dr. Hagens for plastination?
  2. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    05 Oct '15 16:36
    Originally posted by moonbus
    Oh well then, it sounds like you're primed for the big experiment. Which digit do you propose to disengage? How (meat cleaver?)? And would you consider presenting the severed member to Smithsonian Institution or Dr. Hagens for plastination?
    What are you? A damn barbarian from the Middle Ages?

    I am splashing the cash on a top notch veterinarian, of course.
  3. SubscriberAThousandYoung
    Just another day
    tinyurl.com/y3ngvdp2
    Joined
    23 Aug '04
    Moves
    24791
    05 Oct '15 17:08
    Originally posted by Seitse
    What are you? A damn barbarian from the Middle Ages?

    I am splashing the cash on a top notch veterinarian, of course.
    If you go to a plastic surgeon you can get breasts put on where the fingers used to be
  4. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    05 Oct '15 18:38
    Originally posted by AThousandYoung
    If you go to a plastic surgeon you can get breasts put on where the fingers used to be
    What would I use then to fondle the crispy new knockers then?!
  5. Subscribermoonbus
    Uber-Nerd
    Joined
    31 May '12
    Moves
    2490
    05 Oct '15 19:091 edit
    Originally posted by Seitse
    What would I use then to fondle the crispy new knockers then?!
    Your toes.

    EDIT: Assuming, of course, that the vet hasn't nibbled them off, too.
  6. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    06 Oct '15 05:26
    Originally posted by moonbus
    Your toes.

    EDIT: Assuming, of course, that the vet hasn't nibbled them off, too.
    I presume you have never been with a woman, uh?

    It's o.k. I will describe it to you... It feels like... bags of sand.
  7. Subscribermoonbus
    Uber-Nerd
    Joined
    31 May '12
    Moves
    2490
    06 Oct '15 14:32
    Originally posted by Seitse
    I presume you have never been with a woman, uh?

    It's o.k. I will describe it to you... It feels like... bags of sand.
    Hey Seitse, did you ever stop to consider that if you were to mate with a sea anemone, your genes could live on forever in your offspring? Check this out:

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p034jd8p
  8. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    06 Oct '15 14:54
    Originally posted by moonbus
    Hey Seitse, did you ever stop to consider that if you were to mate with a sea anemone, your genes could live on forever in your offspring? Check this out:

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p034jd8p
    http://www.ibtimes.co.uk/russian-scientist-injects-himself-ancient-immortality-bacteria-1522150
  9. Subscribermoonbus
    Uber-Nerd
    Joined
    31 May '12
    Moves
    2490
    06 Oct '15 15:49
    Betcha anything Putin is funding that research.
  10. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    06 Oct '15 17:25
    Of course!

    Russia is now a capitalist country, just like the US, so it means all
    corporations are heavily subsidized by the government.
  11. Subscribermoonbus
    Uber-Nerd
    Joined
    31 May '12
    Moves
    2490
    06 Oct '15 20:43
    Originally posted by Seitse
    Of course!

    Russia is now a capitalist country, just like the US, so it means all
    corporations are heavily subsidized by the government.
    No, I meant that Putin probably has delusions of ruling for life--a very very long life!
  12. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
    Joined
    01 Jan '06
    Moves
    33672
    06 Oct '15 21:46
    Originally posted by moonbus
    No, I meant that Putin probably has delusions of ruling for life--a very very long life!
    I see you were not aware of what we all know already in Europe.

    Vlad... is a vampire. He's immortal already.
  13. Subscribercoquette
    Already mated
    Omaha, Nebraska, USA
    Joined
    04 Jul '06
    Moves
    947202
    09 Oct '15 20:00
    Are we counting thumbs as fingers?
  14. Mar-a-Lago
    Joined
    02 Aug '11
    Moves
    8962
    09 Oct '15 20:15
    I recently went to the doctor and said wherever I touch my body it hurts like hell.
    He said show me.
    So I prodded my leg and screamed in agony.Prodded my arm and screamed in agony.Prodded my shoulder and screamed in agony.

    The doctor said you got a broken finger.
Back to Top