Originally posted by moveitgudtI'm not planning on humiliating anyone. I'm just looking for comments on the premise in the thread title.
What is really bugging you? The General Forum is a social place for anyone and everyone who wants to connect with other chess playahs with OTHER interests beyond and including chess. All the best to you and yours!
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Originally posted by Zort BoyIt's not easy to be humiliated, you need to have a weakness to exploit. Since it's a weakness, you can't necessarily prepare. Preparation would require overcoming the weakness. Overcoming the weakness would eliminate the chance of humiliation.
I'm not planning on humiliating anyone. I'm just looking for comments on the premise in the thread title.
Originally posted by SJ247Good grief! So much effort to humiliate anyone, while a sincere smile and a sincere acknowledgement would suffice. All the best to you and your chess game! 🙂
It's not always easy to be humiliated, you need to have a weakness to exploit. Since it's a weakness, you can't necessarily prepare. Preparation would require overcoming the weakness.
Originally posted by SJ247Rec'd. Your insight is right on the money. Humiliation is an unfortunate and painful social experience. This common
It's not easy to be humiliated, you need to have a weakness to exploit. Since it's a weakness, you can't necessarily prepare. Preparation would require overcoming the weakness. Overcoming the weakness would eliminate the chance of humiliation.
emotional reaction reflects hyper-sensitivity, lack of self esteem and poise... telltale characteristics of immaturity.
Originally posted by Grampy BobbySorry Bob, but your second sentence is completely inaccurate!
Rec'd. Your insight is right on the money. Humiliation is an unfortunate and painful social experience. This common
emotional reaction reflects hyper-sensitivity, lack of self esteem and poise... telltale characteristics of immaturity.
The best and most accomplished are more susceptible to humiliation, as if they don't deliver to expectation they may be seen as imperfect.
It is thos of higher standards, and of higher care, that are more prone to humiliation; contrary to your observation of lack of self-esteem and immaturity.
On many occasions I have seen Queen, Prime-ministers, Princes, Dukes and Duchesses, Stars of many a kind.. all make a wrong move on formal occasions. Their grief and humiliation at not bestowing what is/was expected of them formally is contradictory to all they have worked at and delivered again and again. NOBODY is infallible.
THAT DOES NOT make them of low self-esteem, immature and hyper-sensitive. That's absurd! ðŸ˜
They purely have high standards in-bred, taught to them day in and day out to deliver the best! If they fail - they are humiliated at their own moment of ineptitude! That's all.
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Originally posted by mikelomWhether it's a bad performance, conversational lead balloon or social gaff the immature tend to become inordinately ill at ease... wallowing off balance in revulsive emotional revolt and making convenient excuses. The mature remain steady with grace under pressure still intact... sufficiently focused and objective to own up to the 'I blew it' moment, isolate it, forget it and move on. They remain rational and poised. They don't cry in their beer or indulge in 'woe is me' whispers beneath the din of toasts, violins and royal champagne. -gb
Sorry Bob, but your second sentence is completely inaccurate!
The best and most accomplished are more susceptible to humiliation, as if they don't deliver to expectation they may be seen as imperfect.
It is thos of higher standards, and of higher care, that are more prone to humiliation; contrary to your observation of lack of self-esteem and immaturit best! If they fail - they are humiliated at their own moment of ineptitude! That's all.
-m
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Originally posted by SJ247I disagree entirely. The vast majority of people hold strong opinions that, when pressed, will prove to be contradictory. And holding contradictory opinions makes someone look stupid and so easily humiliated. So I think posing the issue as weakness vs strength tends to obfuscate the issue and makes it seem less common that it is.
It's not easy to be humiliated, you need to have a weakness to exploit. Since it's a weakness, you can't necessarily prepare. Preparation would require overcoming the weakness. Overcoming the weakness would eliminate the chance of humiliation.
There is only one way where you'll never be caught in contradiction. That is to not even venture exposing your opinions.
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Originally posted by PalynkaThe weakness in your example is blowing full steam ahead without all the facts. Letting emotion cloud the argument. Passion. Ego. Whatever.
I disagree entirely. The vast majority of people hold strong opinions that, when pressed, will prove to be contradictory. And holding contradictory opinions makes someone look stupid and so easily humiliated. So I think posing the issue as weakness vs strength tends to obfuscate the issue and makes it seem less common that it is.
There is only one way where you'll never be caught in contradiction. That is to not even venture exposing your opinions.
I certainly didn't intend to say weakness/humiliation is a rarity. I see it just about every day. Usually in Type A's.
"There is only one way where you'll never be caught in contradiction. That is to not even venture exposing your opinions."
Or, think before you speak, and let yourself remain open to other possibilities. Lose the need to always be right. That's a weakness.
Originally posted by PalynkaDo tell, what have you learned in this posh environment over the past few years?
I think the title is true.
These forums are actually a great testing ground for your own ideas. If you cannot defend your opinions properly, someone will come and hammer you down.
If it wasn't like this, I doubt I would have learned as much as I did over the years here. Long may it continue.
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Originally posted by SJ247"let yourself remain open to other possibilities. Lose the need to always be right. That's a weakness. That's it in a 'nutshell'. If I knew how I'd rec it.
The weakness in your example is blowing full steam ahead without all the facts. Letting emotion cloud the argument. Passion. Ego. Whatever.
I certainly didn't intend to say weakness/humiliation is a rarity. I see it just about every day. Usually in Type A's.
"There is only one way where you'll never be caught in contradiction. That is to not even ...[text shortened]... remain open to other possibilities. Lose the need to always be right. That's a weakness.
Originally posted by SJ247Nobody has all the possible facts or a perfectly coherent set of opinions.
The weakness in your example is blowing full steam ahead without all the facts. Letting emotion cloud the argument. Passion. Ego. Whatever.
I certainly didn't intend to say weakness/humiliation is a rarity. I see it just about every day. Usually in Type A's.
"There is only one way where you'll never be caught in contradiction. That is to not even ...[text shortened]... remain open to other possibilities. Lose the need to always be right. That's a weakness.
So it's a "weakness" (now maybe it's more clear why I don't like to state it like that) that everybody has and can never be eliminated. Preparation, however, can minimize the amount of times when you find out about your own contradictions.
I agree, though, that how you react to it is important. You can take it in the chin, accept, learn and move on. Or you can try to save face and only dig yourself a bigger hole (e.g. mikelom). This is where passion, ego or whatever come into play. I fully agree there.
Maybe I was thinking of being humiliated as something others do to you (and not how you react to other's jibes) and this is where we disagreed.