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b
Bill

Perth West Australia

Joined
09 Apr 03
Moves
31360
Clock
25 Nov 03
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>CASE 1
>Getting married is like going to a restaurant with friends.
>You order what you want,
>then when you see what the other fellow has,
>you wish you had ordered that.
>
>CASE 2
>At the cocktail party, one woman said to another,
>Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger??
>The other replied, Yes, I am....... I married the wrong man.
>
>CASE 3
>Before a man is married, he is incomplete.
>Then when he is married, he is finished.
>
>CASE 4
>Marriage is an institution in which a man looses
>his bachelor's degree and the woman gets her master's
>status.
>
>CASE 5
>A little boy asked his father,
>Daddy, how much does it cost to get married??
>And the father replied, I don't know son,
>I'm still paying for it.
>
>CASE 6
>Young son : Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of
>Africa,a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?
>Dad : That happens in most countries son.
>
>CASE 7
>Then there was a man who said, I never knew what
>real happiness was until I got married, and then
>it was too late.
>
>CASE 8
>A happy marriage is a matter of give and take;
>the husband gives and the wife takes
>
>CASE 9
>When a newly married man looks happy, we know why.
>But when a ten-year married man looks happy,
>we wonder why. Affair ?
>
>CASE 10
>Married life is very frustrating.
>In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman
>listens.
>In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
>In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
>
>CASE 11
>After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, You know,
>I was a fool when I married you. And the husband replied,
>Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice it.
>
>CASE 12
>A man inserted an 'ad' in the classified : Wife wanted.
>The next day, he received hundreds letters.
>They all said the same thing You can have mine.
>
>CASE 13
>When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
>you can be sure of one thing :
>either the car is new or his wife is new.
>
>CASE 14
>A woman was telling her friend : It is I who made my
>husband a millionaire. And what was he before you
>married him? the friend asked. The woman replied, A
>multimillionaire.
😀😀😀😀😀😀

b
Bill

Perth West Australia

Joined
09 Apr 03
Moves
31360
Clock
25 Nov 03
Vote Up
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> > > >>Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to
> > > >>the other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do.
> > > >>Whenever I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the
> > > >>headlights off before I get to the driveway. I shut off the
> > > >>engine and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off before I
> > > >>go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, and I get undressed in
> > > >>the bathroom. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and
> > > >>yells at me for staying out so late!" His buddy looks at him and
> > > >>says, "Well, you're obviously taking the wrong approach. I
> > > >>screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps,
> > > >>throw my shoes in the closet, jump into bed, slap her on the ass
> > > >>and say, "WHO'S HORNY".....?!!!" and she acts like she's sound
> > > >>asleep
😲😲😲😲😲

b
Bill

Perth West Australia

Joined
09 Apr 03
Moves
31360
Clock
25 Nov 03
Vote Up
Vote Down

>Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, are excited about their decision To
> > get
> > > married ...
> > > They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and on the way they pass
> > > a Chemist ...... Jacob suggests they go in.
> > > Jacob addresses the man behind the counter: "Are you ! the owner?"
> > > The pharmacist answers "Yes".
> > > Jacob: "We're about to get married. Do you sell heart medication?"
> > > Pharmacist: "Of course we do."
> > > Jacob: "How about medicine for circulation?"
> > > Pharmacist: "All kinds."
> > > Jacob: "Medicine for rheumatism, scoliosis?"
> > > Pharmacist: "Definitely."
> > > Jacob: "How about Viagra?"
> > > Pharmacist: "Of course."
> > > Jacob: "Medicine for memory problems, arthritis, jaundice?"
> > > Pharmacist: "Yes, a large variety..... the works!"
> > > Jacob: "What about vitamins, sleeping pills, antidotes for
> > > Parkinson's Disease?"
> > > Pharmacist: "Absolutely."
> > > Jacob: "You sell wheelchairs and walkers?"
> > > Pharmacist: "All speeds and sizes ..... why do you ask ,..... is
> > > there something I can help you with?"
> > > Jacob says to the pharmacist:
> > > "We'd like to nominate your store as our Bridal Gift Registry."
😀😛😛😀😀😉😉

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