A couple of years ago, when I would be driving along in my car (or sitting along in a bus or train), singing along to my favourite music and pretending I was a famous rock and roll star...
Actually, the most embarrassing occasion in my life was probably my brother walking in on me as I stood posed in front of the mirror singing “Born in the USA” with my badminton racket as a guitar. So embarrassing that I actually taught myself how to play the guitar afterwards....which, coincidently led to probably the second most embarrassing moment of my life...me, totally drunk, on stage in an Irish bar....I couldn’t remember the chords, the lyrics or the tune...but sang the damn song anyways...
So, I would be rolling along by whatever transportation suited my needs (and until I was 29 I didn’t have a driving license...and hell, there are some people think things would be better if I still didn’t have one), pretending to be famous.
Have you ever seen the commitments? You know how the guy acted like he was being interviewed by Terry Wogan? Well...I’ve been interviewed by Wogan more times than I care to remember. And by Rolling Stone magazine, MTV and any number of self-indulgant pop-papers and programs.
One of the main themes these interviewers always had, had to do with my language. It’s no small concern of at least my parents, my former school teachers and any of my bosses, that I do like a good swear on occasion.
And as a young man (up to the age of 33...I now consider myself matured...matured like a Swiss cheese, sprinkled over the pizza of life) I took the hard-core rock and roll stand of....and this is what I’m writing about:
You either play my song as it is written, or you don’t play it at all!
As I’ve grown older and more mature (mature like a good wine in the French restaurant of life...ready to be served with the escargots in garlic butter...) I’ve seemingly mellowed a little. So much so that I’ve written a little article which contains 2 swear words to be exact.
Now, it can get published.
But the swear words have to be removed.
I have now duly removed the swear words and told them to publish it anyways.
And I feel bad about it.
I really feel like I’ve comprimised (and believe me getting the article published isn’t any big deal and it’s not like I’m getting paid for it). I really and truly feel like Terry Wogan is sniggering at me behind my back.
And to be sniggered at by Terry is like having your dick bitten off during a blow-job session as someone rams the back of your car in your drive-way (like the world according to Garp...see, when you grow as old and mature as me, mature like the Sean Connery of James Bond’s in the spy novel of life, you like to act like you’re well read and everything....it adds certain character to you. Like a tweed jacked smelling of urine or socks with holes in them...sorry, I digress).
Let’s put it like this: YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE SNIGGERED AT BY TERRY. It’s like having love-lesson sessions by George Costanza.
So, I put my dilemma to you.
Should I hold my head high and tell them like the matured punk rocker I am: “Publish it like it is, or don’t publish it at all!” (which means that nobody gets to read it and it will perish in the dustbin of literary history) or should I leave things as they are, have it published, read and admired...but feel like a sell-out for the rest of my life??
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On a side note: What did one snail say to the other when a third snail zoomed past in a bright red Porche 911 with an S on the side?
"Look at that S car go!"
Of course the oily , "smart" thing to do is remove the swear words and tell them to publish it . Then publicly scream censureship and that they removed your colorful language . (Lie and blame them)But how would you feel about yourself lieing about such a thing to the public , and playing the game and becoming the thing you hate ?
Focus on the content , Shavi . Focus on WHAT are you saying , not HOW are you saying it .Is the content true to yourself ? Does it get across a message you feel people want/need to hear ? Also understand that those reading it aren't dullards . They know what compromises are about , and that you just don't get heard if you don't meet people half way sometimes .
It sucks , but sometimes life does . And screw anyone who smuggly sniggers at you having to deal with such realities . Their day will come . Karmic payback's a bitch .
If the article means that much to you, then why not try looking for someone else who will publish it intact?
You may even find a magazine (or whatever) willing to part with cash for it.
To quote Christian Slater in The Heathers (about as literary as I get):
"Live fast, die young, leave a good-looking corpse."
Okay, okay, so the quote doesn't fit the circumstances by any stretch of the imagination, but so what?
Most of the time swearing is a lazy habit. If there's another word that does the same job, then use it.
Don't use swearing just as a form of punctuation either. A lot of the times I've encountered someone who swears a lot, I've tried mentally editing their sentences and they say exactly the same thing.
On the other hand, swearing can have its place. The best use of a swear word I can think of is the Pearl Jam song "Jeremy", where the f-word is used to convey contempt in a way I don't think could easily be achieved otherwise.
Originally posted by orfeoAgreed. The English language has many fine adverbs and adjectives, and to use a swear word in their place is just f@#king lazy.
Most of the time swearing is a lazy habit. If there's another word that does the same job, then use it.
Don't use swearing just as a form of punctuation either. A lot of the times I've encountered someone who swears a lot, I've tried mentally editing their sentences and they say exactly the same thing.
On the other hand, swearing can have its place ...[text shortened]... he f-word is used to convey contempt in a way I don't think could easily be achieved otherwise.
Emphasis does have its merits though!