General Forum

General Forum

  1. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
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    21 Jan '16 08:40
    So, in case you plebs did not know, the standard
    flatulence is composed of about 59% nitrogen,
    21% hydrogen, 9% carbon dioxide, 7% methane
    and 4% oxygen. As you possibly know, methane is an
    attractive fuel but capturing and storing it is
    nothing short of challenging.

    Right now there are people trying to collect, store and
    use the methane from cow manure, yes, but this is quite
    a narrow view of things as the estimated cow
    population of the world is 1.3 billion
    while the human
    population is [/b]7.3 billion[/b].

    Why are people still beating around the bushes? My
    brilliant business idea is to farm the methane from
    people's farts through conveniently located collection
    stations
    .

    The methane collected, then broken down through state
    of the art technology, will then be used to provide the
    energy needed in those communities around each
    collection station, which means that if people want
    their homes to have light and their kitchen equipment to
    freakin' work, they have to go and fart into the collection
    point.

    The initial investment needed is 7.3 billion, needed to
    place the 1 collection point per neighborhood in the
    main cities of the world (development phase) and
    connect each one to the power generators feeding each
    area. The revenue model is based on fees paid by the
    authorities, which they save from shutting down the
    electric energy infrastructure and downsizing all those
    pesky public workers. Anyway, they're not needed, as
    now the energy people need will come from their own
    farts.

    The ramp up of the operation (growth phase) will
    be to connect a tube to everybody's rear in each
    neighborhood, so the methane is collected 24/7,
    expanding the power supply which can then be sold
    to industry to power up their needs.

    Finally, there is the world domination phase which
    I will send as a slide deck to those who show interest
    in joining this very lucrative idea.

    PM me.
  2. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
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    21 Jan '16 08:531 edit
    The other option is to farm the methane from Roberta's posts, which
    are so full of it, of course.

    P.S. Thanks for the thumbs down, half man.
  3. Joined
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    21 Jan '16 09:17
    I fart in your general direction. You can do what you will with the methane.

    This idea stinks.
  4. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
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    21 Jan '16 09:25
    Originally posted by KnightStalker47
    I fart in your general direction. You can do what you will with the methane.

    This idea stinks.
    Isn't it? I also think it's great! 😵

    On the other topic:

    Our engineers are right now on their way to connect a collection tube
    so we can proceed with gathering your kind offer.

    As this contract is accepted, should you refuse to have the tube
    inserted for the methane harvesting, our lawyers will contact you
    to discuss the topic of breach of contract.

    Thank you, fart donor. Have a nice day.
  5. Joined
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    21 Jan '16 09:49
    Originally posted by Seitse
    Isn't it? I also think it's great! 😵

    On the other topic:

    Our engineers are right now on their way to connect a collection tube
    so we can proceed with gathering your kind offer.

    As this contract is accepted, should you refuse to have the tube
    inserted for the methane harvesting, our lawyers will contact you
    to discuss the topic of breach of contract.

    Thank you, fart donor. Have a nice day.
    YouTube
  6. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
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    21 Jan '16 10:03
    Originally posted by KnightStalker47
    [youtube]vlDpDr2gQYI[/youtube]
    Yup, that's what you're expected to do once the tube is on.

    Instructions to follow.
  7. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
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    21 Jan '16 20:06
    So, I guess nobody will grab this once in a lifetime opportunity 😞
  8. Joined
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    97073
    21 Jan '16 21:35
    Originally posted by Seitse
    So, I guess nobody will grab this once in a lifetime opportunity 😞
    I may have some interest in your venture but first I need to do some do diligence. Can you send me the schematics for your "state of the art technology" so I may have my people go over them in fine detail. If all goes according to Hoyle we, my investment firm and I, may move to the next level and negotiate some sort of deal.
  9. SubscriberFMF
    Main Poster
    This Thread
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    22 Jan '16 02:141 edit
    If I had money to invest, I think I'd put it into a line of Indonesian shampoos: Durian Shampoo, Shrimp Paste Shampoo, and others.
  10. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
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    22 Jan '16 05:36
    Originally posted by FMF
    If I had money to invest, I think I'd put it into a line of Indonesian shampoos: Durian Shampoo, Shrimp Paste Shampoo, and others.
    Do I remember correctly that Indonesians have the largest per capita
    percentage of premature baldness? 😲
  11. SubscriberFMF
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    22 Jan '16 05:52
    Originally posted by Seitse
    Do I remember correctly that Indonesians have the largest per capita
    percentage of premature baldness? 😲
    I've been up here in my room for years. I don't meet people except online. So I've always assumed everyone is bald.
  12. Standard memberSeitse
    Doug Stanhope
    That's Why I Drink
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    22 Jan '16 07:09
    Originally posted by FMF
    I've been up here in my room for years. I don't meet people except online. So I've always assumed everyone is bald.
    Everyone is bald.

    The Meno problem has been solved: your belief was as useful as
    my knowledge. Take that, Socrates!
  13. Subscriberrookie54
    free tazer tickles..
    wildly content...
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    22 Jan '16 15:26
    Originally posted by KnightStalker47
    [youtube]vlDpDr2gQYI[/youtube]
    YouTube
  14. SubscriberPonderable
    chemist
    Linkenheim
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    22 Jan '16 18:28
    Originally posted by Seitse
    So, I guess nobody will grab this once in a lifetime opportunity 😞
    In fact ou will have noticed that the price of natural gas (our flatulence methane) is coupled to the oil price which is ridicuosly low at the moment. It will rise again, then is the chance.
  15. Joined
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    22 Jan '16 19:32
    Originally posted by Ponderable
    In fact ou will have noticed that the price of natural gas (our flatulence methane) is coupled to the oil price which is ridicuosly low at the moment. It will rise again, then is the chance.
    Buy low, sell high.
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