Ninjas have Real Ultimate Power and claim to always beat pirates, but pirates have the Flying Spaghetti Monster and ninjas do not figure into their world at all. It's possible the ninjas are obsessed with envy for the pirates and the pirates are so happy being pirates that ninjas don't matter to them. Or, perhaps, the pirates avoid mention of ninjas out of fear and shame.
I wonder where the shrine to the FSM is in Somalia? He has a lot of converts over there.
Has Japan sent any warships to fight the pirates? If so, you know they must have been crawling with ninjas.
Smaste Schmaste
- An excerpt from "Ask a Ninja Presents: The Ninja Handbook (this book looks forward to killing
you soon)" (possibly the most useful handbook I've ever acquired):
Everyone who has been to Texas or Wal-Mart knows that the ability to smell and the ability to
taste are inextricably linked. Similarly, most alive people know that olfactory processes form the
strongest link to memory.
The amazingness that a ninja become aware of is that taste forms an incredibly strong link to the
future. Have you ever been so close to something that you could "taste it"? That's the future. The
problem with the future is that it's incredibly fast. This may seem obvious, since it has maintained
the ability to stay ahead of the past and the present forever. Yet you constantly see non-ninjas
naively assume that they know where the future is headed: Thomas Dewey, Ferdinand Von
Zeppelin, Dr. Emmet Brown.
To avoid the tragedies of these men and others, a ninja always combines smell and taste into a
single sense: smaste. Once mastered, smaste allow the ninja to remember things just before they
happen.
Yeah, I'm gonna go with ninja. Haaai-aaaa! Or: ssssss-BAM, as it were.