Non-chess sentences with chess words

Make a non chess related sentence, phrase, pun, double-entendre etc, which uses a chess related word or words or variants thereof. Rule bending is allowed, but so is calling “timeout” 💀 if you feel someone’s missed the mark.


I had an authentic Chinese meal last night but couldn’t eat any of it as I didn’t have a fork.

We have two rooks that visit us daily, and squawk until we throw monkey nuts out of the window.

(True story).

it was a dark and stormy knight

the queen of all the goddesses
smiled as she hewed off my head
there'll be no more laughter on this mournful day
as all over the board i've bled

Rank and File members of the Area 64 union are thankful to the bishop

@Earl-of-Trumps said
Rank and File members of the Area 64 union are thankful to the bishop

I was thinking of going to see ELO but their last gig wasn’t rated.

I was just playing Elton John's 'sacrifice' (which I had on file).

It was rank.

I don’t like my phone as the battery is weak.

@diver
The doctor just finished up patching a big bullet hole and said 'That was quite an opening'......

@sonhouse said
@diver
The doctor just finished up patching a big bullet hole and said 'That was quite an opening'......

*smirk*

i done pinned hiz queen up against hiz king
and altho they seemed to enjoy it
i shall now detect my rival's evil plan
and use a pawn to destroy it

*giggle*

roast chicken and fried pickles for breakfast
sorta like a knight/bishop endgame
altho it can be done, and there's nothing wrong with that
the concept of the plan hurts my brain

@rookie54
Where is our queen sir knight? She is in hiding, forces are after her so we have to protect her.

“A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse!”