You Britons can ignore this thread as none of you would know what I'm refering to.
Anyway, last night I had my routine, 6 month dentist visit planned. Normally, this isn't torture, but, Carla, my dental hygenist is a hot little blonde... slightly older, but, hot nonetheless. Unfortunately she was a little heavy handed last night... something I usually pay extra for, but, I wasn't in the mood. In addition to being repeatedly stabbed in the gums with various pointy instruments, at one point she attempted to set a record and jam her entire fist into my mouth. I won't even go into the Cher marathon playing on the office speaker system.
After what seemed an eternity, I fled the dentist's office and hit the pub on the corner to try to staunch the blood flow from my brutalized gums.
** Time passes **
On the way home I took a back road route to burn the gunk out of my new 4x4. Passing near a Wildlife Management Area a Skunk Ape with an enormous erection leapt out in front of my truck. For those of you unfamiliar with the Skunk Ape, they are very rare, hairy, smelly, chewbacca looking creatures... very much like the Welsh. Anyway, I slammed on the brakes, but, with the gravel road it took a while to come to a stop. I clipped the beast with my mirror, but, fortunately, I seemed to only have stunned him as he lumbered off into the forest with his semi-flaccid member swinging in the wind.
Originally posted by Hand of HecateSo the main idea of this post is that the sight of you gives a male skunk ape a hard-on? 😉
You Britons can ignore this thread as none of you would know what I'm refering to.
Anyway, last night I had my routine, 6 month dentist visit planned. Normally, this isn't torture, but, Carla, my dental hygenist is a hot little blonde... slightly older, but, hot nonetheless. Unfortunately she was a little heavy handed last night... something I us ...[text shortened]... d him as he lumbered off into the forest with his semi-flaccid member swinging in the wind.
Originally posted by Hand of HecateWhat you didn't know was the poor creature was the victim of a mad scientist who, while trying to cure impotence in humans, experimented on animals first to verify his sick theories. So he got around to the great ape and implanted a prothsetic into the poor animals penis which gave the thing a permanent hardon. At first the ape was overjoyed and performed heroic sex acts on the female apes, also undergoing humiliating genetailia modifications. But after a few days, the poor ape kept getting attacked by the female apes who liked the idea of a permently hard male around. This caused the male to go into a depressive state and in a final fit of agony over the situation, took out on his own and leaped the double razor wire barrier of the cages and thats when he met your car and was left dazed by the impact. You prematurely judged this poor ape who was the victim of a mengala era Nazi scientist.
I believe he was hard before I ran him over. I can't say what brought on said hardon. One might ask, "Why does the wind blow?"