Spiritual guidance for the General Forum

Behold! For I am here, speaking words of light and
guidance to your hearts, oh salacious sinners, clueless
acolytes of Satan.

I am The chosen one and I have been warned that these
catacombs called General Forum are overflowing with
trolling sins and debauchery, putrid copy pasting
and lost souls searching for the One True Path.

Lay your worries, questions, and prayers to the altar of this
thread and I shall return your humble approach to me
with the wisest, most profound words of guidance.

There is no worst blind that he who refuses to see.

The Official Ayatollah Thread™ is now open for consultation.
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Help me to find the right path.
I tremble in fear with enemies all around me.
I dread the action that I must take.
It will be violent but necessary.
Is there some way to show my opponent that he should resign lest he knoweth the wrath of my next move?