Offensive Chess

Anyone here play with high school/college/late teen-early 20's people?
I do, and it's a gas. A few simple rules:

1. When delivering mate, announce in a loud voice "Checkmate, FAG!"

2. When your opponent is taking a long time and says "let me think", say "why start now"?

3. If you ever beat a much stronger player, never, EVER, play him again, just brag to everyone about how badly you thrashed him on your last game. Call him a kweer. He prolly is because you beat him.

Rules to live by, people.

Dont forget that if you should happen to lose, roll your eyes and give a scoff of disbelief, make sure your opponent knows it is because he got "lucky" and that it is "the only way you will ever beat me."

I like it 🙂

make sure you get psychiatric help after you complete the above tips.

I thought this was going to be offensive play as opposed to defensive... 😞

Funny though. 😵

When you are about to lose, yell out " Hey,I didn't know Fritz worked on ipods!"🙄

You get quite a bit of 'offensive' chess in online blitz, namely:

waiting for your timer to reach 1 second left left before delivering mate.
queening every possible pawn without giving stalemate on a lone king.
persistantly offering draws in a lost position.
Adding heaps of time to opponents in a dead position who are letting the timer run out.

When you're losing a positional game, tell your opponent he plays like a poosay.

Originally posted by AThousandYoung
When you're losing a positional game, tell your opponent he plays like a poosay.

Get a handheld radio, crank it up to full volume and slide it over to your opponents side of the board and yell "Don't you hate it when people cut one and play the radio loudly to cover it up?"

Inspired by the simpsons

Viktor Korchnoi

Originally posted by RahimK
Viktor Korchnoi

Originally posted by Sam The Sham
Anyone here play with high school/college/late teen-early 20's people?
I do, and it's a gas. A few simple rules:

1. When delivering mate, announce in a loud voice "Checkmate, FAG!"

2. When your opponent is taking a long time and says "let me think", say "why start now"?

3. If you ever beat a much stronger player, never, EVER, play him again ...[text shortened]... game. Call him a kweer. He prolly is because you beat him.

Rules to live by, people.

Originally posted by cmsMaster
Hahaha, from the Polgar blitz vid? That ones a little obscure, but still funny.