Not really a riddle but...

Toast lands butter side down because of the SIZE of the human body, not the SHAPE; an
image does not have to be the same size as the original. If we were much taller, when we
dropped our toast it would flip twice in the air and land butter side up. Given that talking
about the size of an omnipresent God is meaningless, maybe God's toast doesn't land at all...

... or maybe the one time God does drop his toast is during the Apocalypse, and the final
battle between good and evil is to determine which side the toast lands on.

I apologize for any mental traumas the ambiguity of my previous post
has caused. I did, indeed, mean to say size rather than shape.

However, I also maintain that all this talk of God dropping his toast
during the Apocalypse is totally ludicrous.

--Rein

I can't think of a better way to use a cat...

the rest of my "theory":however, In the buttered toast case, it's the
butter
that causes it to land buttered side down - it doesn't
have to be toast, the theory works equally well with
Jacob's Cream Crackers. So to save money I think you
just miss out the toast - and butter the cats. Also,
should there be an imbalance between the effects of cat
and butter, there are other substances that have a
stronger affinity for carpet.

Consider that the probability of carpet impact is
determined by the
following simple formula: P =3D S * t(t)/tc
where P is the probability of carpet impact, and S is
the stain value of
the toast-covering substance - an indicator of the
effectiveness of the
topping in permanently staining the carpet.

Chicken Tikka Masala, for example, has a very high S
value, while the 3D
value of water is zero. tc and t(t) indicate the tone
of the carpet and
topping respectively - the value of P being strongly
related to the
relationship between the colour of the carpet and
topping, as even Chicken
Tikka Masala won't cause a permanent and obvious stain
if the carpet is the
same colour.

So it is clear that the probability of carpet impact is
maximised if you
use Chicken Tikka Masala and a white carpet - in fact
this combination gives a P value of one, which is the
same as the probability of a cat landing on
its feet. Therefore a cat with Chicken Tikka Masala
plastered on its back will be certain to hover in mid
air. Contrastingly, there could be problems
with buttered toast as the toast may fall off the cat,
causing a terrible monorail crash resulting in
nauseating images of members of the royal
family visiting accident victims in hospital, and
politicians saying it wouldn't have happened if their
party was in power as there would have been more
investment in cat-toast glue research.

Therefore it is in the interests not only of public
safety, but also public sanity, if the buttered toast
on cats idea is scrapped, to be replaced by a
monorail powered by cats smeared with Chicken Tikka
Masala floating above a rail made from white wool shag
pile carpet.

p.s. i think a limit should be made on the amount that you can post
during a game at each move, cause i just posted this to jacko007,
and it takes up more than half the screen-oops...

Okay, I know this is just for fun...and it is quite funny, too. But I think
you've dropped over the edge, and now it is you who spins above the
carpet. Ever feel like we all need something to do with our lives?! Just
being facetious, of course...or AM I...hmmmm!

coyote

Could we just possibly put a cat smeared with butter into a closed box
with a vial of poison to be triggered by the radioactive decay of a
certain element and drop it? The box would stay levitated if the vial
remained untriggered, but fall to the ground should the poison was
triggered by the emission of radioactivity. We could tell whether
Schroedinger's cat's waveform collapsed without opening the box. I
wonder if it would go *splat* and get all messy when it collapsed .

Some of you may argue that this still doesn't disprove the original
theory, as the "did-the-box-hit-the-ground-or-not" observation
functions the same as actually opening the box in determining the
condition of the cat and thus the uncertainty principle is not violated.
To you, I say "pthbt".

--Rein

As I trained scientist, I feel I must insert some scientific rigor here.

See, you've made the assumption that a dead cat won't land on its
feet. Until you actually test that hypothesis, it's just idle speculation.

And please do it with proper statistical rigor - 30 cats minimum. And of
course, you can't just test the cats live, then dead. You must test half
the cats dead first, then live.

I leave it to you to work out the experimental details. Please have the
reanimation protocol worked out by Wednesday to present at group
meeting....

Potty trained, you mean?

--Rein

Have you acquired the PETA stamp of approval to conduct such
experimentations? Don't forget all the government agencies! They say
that if Noah had to float an ark today, the paperwork would kill the
project.

Coyote

Of course, God would have had a hard time filling out the
enviromental impact statement for that flood. Coulda used the EPA
way back then, nip these Wrath of God disasters right in the bud.

Oh, that's too good. I'm dipping my cat in Chicken Tikka Masala this
very night!

Try Tuscan Coca-Cola Chicken BBQ grilling marinade sauce to see how
things might work out in the mediterranean.

Coyote