13 Dec 07
I was in a gravel parking lot of a church answering a cell phone call. As I hung up this woman came up to my window and rapped on it to get my attention. Aside from scarring the hell out of me, disturbing my inner calm pissed me off. I cracked the window a couple of inches, you never know what these freaks are going to do, and asked her what she wanted. She said she'd run out of gas just down the road and wanted a ride to a gas station. I promptly told her to get stuffed, slammed the truck into drive and hauled ass out of the parking lot leaving her to choke gravel and dust. Classic move that made me laugh out loud to myself.
Shortly thereafter I came uncomfortably close to crapping my pants. The pressure was immense and I may have done my sphincter permanent damage. Is this God's punishment?
13 Dec 07
Originally posted by Hand of HecateOf course not.
I was in a gravel parking lot of a church answering a cell phone call. As I hung up this woman came up to my window and rapped on it to get my attention. Aside from scarring the hell out of me, disturbing my inner calm pissed me off. I cracked the window a couple of inches, you never know what these freaks are going to do, and asked her what she wa ...[text shortened]... sure was immense and I may have done my sphincter permanent damage. Is this God's punishment?
Obviously she was a witch and put a hex on you.
Inform the local inquisitors and get yourself some garlic and sage.
13 Dec 07
Originally posted by Hand of HecateDid you have your hood on when she approached your truck?
I was in a gravel parking lot of a church answering a cell phone call. As I hung up this woman came up to my window and rapped on it to get my attention. Aside from scarring the hell out of me, disturbing my inner calm pissed me off. I cracked the window a couple of inches, you never know what these freaks are going to do, and asked her what she wa ...[text shortened]... sure was immense and I may have done my sphincter permanent damage. Is this God's punishment?
13 Dec 07
Originally posted by Hand of HecateThe state of mind that you invited into yourself by your actions and attitude are their own punishment. In a sense by offering disrespect to someone else you have already punished yourself.
I was in a gravel parking lot of a church answering a cell phone call. As I hung up this woman came up to my window and rapped on it to get my attention. Aside from scarring the hell out of me, disturbing my inner calm pissed me off. I cracked the window a couple of inches, you never know what these freaks are going to do, and asked her what she wa ...[text shortened]... sure was immense and I may have done my sphincter permanent damage. Is this God's punishment?
13 Dec 07
Originally posted by Hand of HecateYes, but the worst is yet to come. Next time you will crap your pants! 😲
I was in a gravel parking lot of a church answering a cell phone call. As I hung up this woman came up to my window and rapped on it to get my attention. Aside from scarring the hell out of me, disturbing my inner calm pissed me off. I cracked the window a couple of inches, you never know what these freaks are going to do, and asked her what she wa ...[text shortened]... sure was immense and I may have done my sphincter permanent damage. Is this God's punishment?
14 Dec 07
Originally posted by Hand of HecateWhat would have been even funnier is if you had let her in the car and then crapped your pants. Now thats an awkward situation to say the least. The only question really is who would have jumped out of the car first!!
Come on now, if she'd been ethnically challenged I wouldn't have rolled down the window before peeling out.
15 Dec 07
Originally posted by whodeyThis isn't a laughing matter, I'm still suffering under the hand of divine retrobution. I had to pick some things up this morning at a grocery store and obliterated a stall in their restroom. It probably sounded like a moose was being slaughtered to anyone with 30 yards of the restroom. I actually had to take my pants off to finish the job. Sweet Jesus, I think I've got leprosy of the colon or some other biblical rectal plague.
What would have been even funnier is if you had let her in the car and then crapped your pants. Now thats an awkward situation to say the least. The only question really is who would have jumped out of the car first!!