1. Riding the Atom Bomb
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    06 Jul '05 12:57
    Adam and Eve were apes??
  2. Standard memberPhlabibit
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    06 Jul '05 13:16
    Originally posted by dale21
    Adam and Eve were apes??
    You should protect your great ideas so no one else steals them.

    P-
  3. Standard memberDaemon Sin
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    06 Jul '05 14:57
    Originally posted by catfoodtim
    but why would a snake speak to a lady ape? it wouldnt understand what the snake was saying.
    But it did speak to them, so they must have understood each other, so they must have been snakes! WOW!!! Behold the power of logical assumption!
  4. Riding the Atom Bomb
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    06 Jul '05 16:41
    it is common knowledge that all animals are telepathic and can understand each others languages and dialects. Who said the forbidden fruit was an apple? I beleive it to be a melon. Of course the ape lady Eve didnt need a fig leaf, she had more hair than she knew what to do with it. Your right i should copyright this, its gold dust.
  5. Standard memberBosse de Nage
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    07 Jul '05 10:54
    Those were illogical times, Tim. Think of that old number "Yes, we have no bananas!"
  6. Standard membermochiron
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    07 Jul '05 11:59
    Originally posted by Bosse de Nage
    Those were illogical times, Tim. Think of that old number "Yes, we have no bananas!"
    i thought they were the back up singer for the Osmond family Reunion Tour 2003~
  7. Standard memberBosse de Nage
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    07 Jul '05 12:42
    Adam and Eve, the singing apes of Eden? I wouldn't put it past them. They've been around the block a few times they have always going on about their bloody bananas.
  8. Cosmos
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    07 Jul '05 13:36
    Yes, but they are very apeeling.
  9. Riding the Atom Bomb
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    07 Jul '05 14:491 edit
    Originally posted by catfoodtim
    so, just so i am clear on the story of creation: god created two apes, a boy ape and a lady ape. god warned them not to eat his melon, but a snake telepathically told them to go right ahead. one melon later god boots them out of the ga ...[text shortened]... war 2? i feel this is a major flaw in your compelling case.

    Your missing a couple of links in the chain my good friend. God was at first an ape, but evolved. Having no banana's only furthers the arguement for the first ape nation, theyve obviously eaten them all.
    The rest of what you said tho was accurate. Eve had more hair than adam! Melons are stil forbidden (to apes), and snakes are telepathic but on a level we havent come to understand yet. Any other bible queries you want me to iron out for you?

    I have copyright!!! Musical, i like it.
  10. Riding the Atom Bomb
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    07 Jul '05 15:161 edit
    Originally posted by catfoodtim
    dale21, if you're interested in starting a religion just give me a shout.

    couple of questions first:

    1)what became of the original bad telepathic snake that caused this whole mess?
    2)what did god evolve into? and did it hurt it? ...[text shortened]...
    the first ape nation? wow. how do i apply for citizenship?

    Well starting a religion does sound appealing, but they have such a bad reputation, so we ll call it an institution...."The Inconceivable Truth"(T.I.T)
    I ll be glad to answer your questions.
    1)The original Snake was called Santa (why they anagramed it to Satan i ll never know). He was particularly gifted in the art of telepathy and West end market trading. He could sell ice to the eskimos, and of course melons to the apes.
    2)God evolved more than once. In fact 47times, called the epok-change, and as he has reached full evo-level, he cant change no more. He started as a snail, and reached apehood by the 4th stage, where he aquired the creation level up ability. Thus making a couple of little versions of himself.
    3)Shortly after eating the melon and being cast out, eve found that she got rather hot and swetty, and was rather uncomfortable. Picking up on eves telepathic signal, market trader santa sold her a range of new cosmetic products. One of which was a state of the art Flint bladed razor. After a few painful attempts Eve became far less hairy in vital regions.

    Simple.your Citizenship is stil being processed.
  11. Joined
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    07 Jul '05 17:06
    Originally posted by catfoodtim
    dale21, if you're interested in starting a religion just give me a shout.

    couple of questions first:

    1)what became of the original bad telepathic snake that caused this whole mess?
    2)what did god evolve into? and did it hurt it?
    3)what happened to eve's extra hair?

    oh bugger its home time. i'm going to quiz you more tomorrow
    please.

    the first ape nation? wow. how do i apply for citizenship?

    scratch yur armpits and beat yur chest! * giggle* thats how you should get citizenship! ^.^
  12. Riding the Atom Bomb
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    07 Jul '05 20:21
    Originally posted by Valdorien
    scratch yur armpits and beat yur chest! * giggle* thats how you should get citizenship! ^.^
    It takes more than that. consider your citizenship refused.
  13. Riding the Atom Bomb
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    08 Jul '05 12:27
    I have gleaned more from the light.
    The ape nation has made itself known to me, but only those with the mark on the forheads will survive. That was at the dawn of time, just after the apes had to progress from melons to grapes.

    http://www.thirdstoneartgallery.com/GRAPHICS/apes-n-grapes.JPG
  14. Standard memberPhlabibit
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    08 Jul '05 13:121 edit
    Originally posted by dale21
    I have gleaned more from the light.
    The ape nation has made itself known to me, but only those with the mark on the forheads will survive. That was at the dawn of time, just after the apes had to progress from melons to grapes.

    http://www.thirdstoneartgallery.com/GRAPHICS/apes-n-grapes.JPG
    What did I tell you about your great ideas?

    P-

    Edit! Grape Ideas.....
  15. Riding the Atom Bomb
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    08 Jul '05 14:252 edits
    Now, having had numerous bad incidents in various institutions throughout my young and innocent life I was initially suspicious, I am not afraid to admit, dale21. but after a cup of coffee and a bunch of grapes and a bit of reflection i think i agree. the last religion i got inv ...[text shortened]... y passport before then? I can show you my tickets if that would help.
    1)Im sorry to hear about your troubled past. Its not easy growing up in hordes or grease ridden slimeballs after your crown jewels. You will not be asked to give YOUR money to the institution, but rather you must present a substantial amount of someone elses money. No questions will be asked as to the origin of the money. The money is essential for the inauguration ceremony which can last a number of sleepless nights where we have to indulge in a number of ellict practises with the aid of the donation. These acts are reffered to as the essential sins, where drink and women are our top concern.
    2)Titles are a must. But not of a high and mighty standard. You may refer to me as KL££N A$$. You may submit a name that will be considered befor the T.I.T commitee.
    3)Your quite right in saying many were after Eve's melons. As previously stated however the snake is santa, and he proceeded to become a market trader for a time. He dabbled in magic tricks and rain dancing. He gave that up tho when he had a disagreement with his mate Noah, but thats another story.
    4)It seems logical that some mail snails have genitalia on the head. I know a few people on this site that are decendants of such snails, and still proudly show off their Genitals on their forheads.
    5)Unfortunately we dont have the capability to produce mini Gods as yet. We are stil recovering the secret intricate and detailed design specifications outlined in the 10 Commandments. but we are getting closer each week.

    Enjoy your trip, and bring back a sheep so we can have a B>B>Q, i mean sacrifice. Yours truly KL££N A$$

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