You just couldn't bring yourself to acknowledge God, so in a fit of jealousy and rage you murdered your brother, and to cover up your guilt you denied accountability.
Then you ran away in fear for your life and built a fortress to fortify and justify your denial. You paved over the truth with every excuse you could think of. Your greatest achievement was in denying the very existence of God.
You are the father of atheism.
But you are not really an atheist at all. You are your own god. You are accountable to no one but yourself. Or so you think. You are self justified, therefore you can validate yourself by yourself. After all, who else is there besides yourself that you must answer to?
Atheism is a void. The seat of chaos and meaninglessness and ultimately death. Atheism offers no hope, no truth of any substance, and no love worth finding. Atheism is shrouded in fear and hopelessness. Atheism carries with it the illusion of a life while denying the existence of the spring of life. The best atheism can produce is a theory that the universe came about by mere circumstance, and one that leaves a man out in the cold chance-less void of the specter of nonexistence.