1. Standard memberHand of Hecate
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    24 May '06 22:03
    We have pieces of the cross, blood, shrouds, spear heads, chalices, thorny crowns and a host of other Holy Relics. Yet, what I can only presume to be the most prevalent Holy Relic, Jesus's poop, is not represented. At an average of 1lb per day, we're talking a very significant amount of Holy Poo. Surely some of it was gathered and fashioned into Holy Relics and yet I can find no reference to the Poo of Jesus every being collected.
  2. Standard memberCrowley
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    24 May '06 22:18
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    We have pieces of the cross, blood, shrouds, spear heads, chalices, thorny crowns and a host of other Holy Relics. Yet, what I can only presume to be the most prevalent Holy Relic, Jesus's poop, is not represented. At an average of 1lb per day, we're talking a very significant amount of Holy Poo. Surely some of it was gathered and fashioned into Holy Relics and yet I can find no reference to the Poo of Jesus every being collected.
    If Jesus' crap hits the fan, does it spread love and peace or just stink up the place like normal feces?
  3. Standard memberHalitose
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    24 May '06 22:24
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    We have pieces of the cross, blood, shrouds, spear heads, chalices, thorny crowns and a host of other Holy Relics. Yet, what I can only presume to be the most prevalent Holy Relic, Jesus's poop, is not represented. At an average of 1lb per day, we're talking a very significant amount of Holy Poo. Surely some of it was gathered and fashioned into Holy Relics and yet I can find no reference to the Poo of Jesus every being collected.
    You're really stirring it, aren't ya? 😛
  4. Forgotten
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    24 May '06 22:256 edits
    Originally posted by Crowley
    If Jesus' crap hits the fan, does it spread love and peace or just stink up the place like normal feces?
    It stinks to high heaven.
  5. Standard memberHand of Hecate
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    24 May '06 22:27
    Originally posted by Halitose
    You're really stirring it, aren't ya? 😛
    Who, me? Surely not?!

    Holy Poo conundrum is a valid question that will keep me awake late into the night.
  6. Standard memberHalitose
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    24 May '06 22:29
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    Who, me? Surely not?!

    Holy Poo conundrum is a valid question that will keep me awake late into the night.
    Giggles.
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    25 May '06 03:25
    That makes about as much sense as asking where is Shakespeare's 5hit or Caesar's or Ghandi's always remember Poo is somethings food. so something had a holy meal. 😀
  8. Standard memberorfeo
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    25 May '06 03:28
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    We have pieces of the cross, blood, shrouds, spear heads, chalices, thorny crowns and a host of other Holy Relics. Yet, what I can only presume to be the most prevalent Holy Relic, Jesus's poop, is not represented. At an average of 1lb per day, we're talking a very significant amount of Holy Poo. Surely some of it was gathered and fashioned into Holy Relics and yet I can find no reference to the Poo of Jesus every being collected.
    If they didn't realise he was divine until after the resurrection, then the opportunity had already (ahem) passed.
  9. The sky
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    25 May '06 03:38
    Originally posted by orfeo
    If they didn't realise he was divine until after the resurrection, then the opportunity had already (ahem) passed.
    Didn't he have to poo anymore after the resurrection?
  10. Standard memberorfeo
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    25 May '06 03:40
    Originally posted by Nordlys
    Didn't he have to poo anymore after the resurrection?
    I hope not. If eternal life still requires going to the loo, I'm going to be filing a complaint.
  11. Cape Town
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    25 May '06 06:37
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    We have pieces of the cross, blood, shrouds, spear heads, chalices, thorny crowns and a host of other Holy Relics. Yet, what I can only presume to be the most prevalent Holy Relic, Jesus's poop, is not represented. At an average of 1lb per day, we're talking a very significant amount of Holy Poo. Surely some of it was gathered and fashioned into Holy Relics and yet I can find no reference to the Poo of Jesus every being collected.
    The whole concept of such a thing as a holy relic is so much against the whole doctrine of Christianity that it has always amazed me how many Christians believe in them.
  12. Standard memberCrowley
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    25 May '06 07:16
    Thinking about it, this must be where the expression of surprise 'HOLY CRAP!' comes from...

    Will Dan Brown write a book about this? Hand, you better make sure you get some royalties out of this.
  13. Standard memberHand of Hecate
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    25 May '06 13:06
    Originally posted by twhitehead
    The whole concept of such a thing as a holy relic is so much against the whole doctrine of Christianity that it has always amazed me how many Christians believe in them.
    This is a great point Twithead, but, everyone likes to have a souvenir which is essentially what relics are. I'm not proposing idol worship or anything like that, I'd just like a poo of Jesus key ring. Even poo of the Pope, set into an acrylic block, would make a great necklace, key ring or paperweight.

    Surely the Vatican needs to be advised of the huge marketing engine they are neglecting. Poo of the Pope nick nacks will sell like hot cakes.
  14. Standard memberDerfel Cadarn
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    25 May '06 13:14
    Jesus lived off of Chinese food. Therefore, his poo is known as 'algae'.
  15. Account suspended
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    26 May '06 16:57
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    We have pieces of the cross, blood, shrouds, spear heads, chalices, thorny crowns and a host of other Holy Relics. Yet, what I can only presume to be the most prevalent Holy Relic, Jesus's poop, is not represented. At an average of 1lb per day, we're talking a very significant amount of Holy Poo. Surely some of it was gathered and fashioned into Holy Relics and yet I can find no reference to the Poo of Jesus every being collected.
    Perhaps the Gnostics were right after all. They believed Jesus was a phantom so he would have expelled only Phantom Poo.
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