23 Feb '08 08:01

Put this in general, decided it was better here.... No offense is intended to anyone.... and it is kinda funny.... Check out the Catholicism, Jehovah's witness and Chauvinism ones

S**t

# Taoism: S**t happens.

# Confucianism: Confucius say, "S**t happens."

# Buddhism: If S**t happens, it isn't really S**t.

# Zen Buddhism: S**t is, and is not.

# Zen Buddhism #2: What is the sound of S**t happening?

# Hinduism: This S**t has happened before.

# Islam: If S**t happens, it is the will of Allah.

# Islam #2: If S**t happens, kill the person responsible.

# Islam #3: If S**t happens, blame Israel.

# Catholicism: If S**t happens, you deserve it.

# Protestantism: Let S**t happen to someone else.

# Presbyterian: This S**t was bound to happen.

# Episcopalian: It's not so bad if S**t happens, as long as you serve the right wine with it.

# Methodist: It's not so bad if S**t happens, as long as you serve grape juice with it.

# Congregationalist: S**t that happens to one person is just as good as S**t that happens to another.

# Unitarian: S**t that happens to one person is just as bad as S**t that happens to another.

# Lutheran: If S**t happens, don't talk about it.

# Fundamentalism: If S**t happens, you will go to hell, unless you are born again. (Amen!)

# Fundamentalism #2: If S**t happens to a televangelist, it's okay.

# Fundamentalism #3: S**t must be born again.

# Judaism: Why does this S**t always happen to us?

# Calvinism: S**t happens because you don't work.

# Seventh Day Adventism: No S**t shall happen on Saturday.

# Creationism: God made all S**t so how could this S**t have turned into that S**t.

# Secular Humanism: S**t evolves.

# Christian Science: When S**t happens, don't call a doctor - pray!

# Christian Science #2: S**t happening is all in your mind.

# Unitarianism: Come let us reason together about this S**t.

# Quakers: Let us not fight over this S**t.

# Utopianism: This S**t does not stink.

# Darwinism: This S**t was once food.

# Capitalism: That's MY S**t.

# Communism: It's everybody's S**t.

# Feminism: Men are S**t.

# Chauvinism: We may be S**t, but you can't live without us...

# Commercialism: Let's package this S**t.

# Impressionism: From a distance, S**t looks like a garden.

# Idolism: Let's bronze this S**t.

# Existentialism: S**t doesn't happen; S**t IS.

# Existentialism #2: What is S**t, anyway?

# Stoicism: This S**t is good for me.

# Hedonism: There is nothing like a good S**t happening!

# Mormonism: God sent us this S**t

# Mormonism #2: This S**t is going to happen again.

# Wiccan: An it harm none, let S**t happen.

# Scientology: If S**t happens, see "Dianetics", p.157.

# Jehovah's Witnesses: >Knock< >Knock< S**t happens.

# Jehovah's Witnesses #2: May we have a moment of your time to show you some of our S**t?

# Jehovah's Witnesses #3: S**t has been prophesied and is imminent; only the righteous shall survive its happening.

# Moonies: Only really happy S**t happens.

# Hare Krishna: S**t happens, rama rama.

# Rastafarianism: Let's smoke this S**t!

# Zoroastrianism: S**t happens half on the time.

# Church of SubGenius: BoB S**t.

# Practical: Deal with S**t one day at a time.

# Agnostic: S**t might have happened; then again, maybe not.

# Agnostic #2: Did someone S**t?

# Agnostic #3: What is this S**t?

# Satanism: SNEPPAH TIHS.

# Atheism: What S**t?

# Atheism #2: I can't believe this S**t!

# Nihilism: No S**t.

S**t

# Taoism: S**t happens.

# Confucianism: Confucius say, "S**t happens."

# Buddhism: If S**t happens, it isn't really S**t.

# Zen Buddhism: S**t is, and is not.

# Zen Buddhism #2: What is the sound of S**t happening?

# Hinduism: This S**t has happened before.

# Islam: If S**t happens, it is the will of Allah.

# Islam #2: If S**t happens, kill the person responsible.

# Islam #3: If S**t happens, blame Israel.

# Catholicism: If S**t happens, you deserve it.

# Protestantism: Let S**t happen to someone else.

# Presbyterian: This S**t was bound to happen.

# Episcopalian: It's not so bad if S**t happens, as long as you serve the right wine with it.

# Methodist: It's not so bad if S**t happens, as long as you serve grape juice with it.

# Congregationalist: S**t that happens to one person is just as good as S**t that happens to another.

# Unitarian: S**t that happens to one person is just as bad as S**t that happens to another.

# Lutheran: If S**t happens, don't talk about it.

# Fundamentalism: If S**t happens, you will go to hell, unless you are born again. (Amen!)

# Fundamentalism #2: If S**t happens to a televangelist, it's okay.

# Fundamentalism #3: S**t must be born again.

# Judaism: Why does this S**t always happen to us?

# Calvinism: S**t happens because you don't work.

# Seventh Day Adventism: No S**t shall happen on Saturday.

# Creationism: God made all S**t so how could this S**t have turned into that S**t.

# Secular Humanism: S**t evolves.

# Christian Science: When S**t happens, don't call a doctor - pray!

# Christian Science #2: S**t happening is all in your mind.

# Unitarianism: Come let us reason together about this S**t.

# Quakers: Let us not fight over this S**t.

# Utopianism: This S**t does not stink.

# Darwinism: This S**t was once food.

# Capitalism: That's MY S**t.

# Communism: It's everybody's S**t.

# Feminism: Men are S**t.

# Chauvinism: We may be S**t, but you can't live without us...

# Commercialism: Let's package this S**t.

# Impressionism: From a distance, S**t looks like a garden.

# Idolism: Let's bronze this S**t.

# Existentialism: S**t doesn't happen; S**t IS.

# Existentialism #2: What is S**t, anyway?

# Stoicism: This S**t is good for me.

# Hedonism: There is nothing like a good S**t happening!

# Mormonism: God sent us this S**t

# Mormonism #2: This S**t is going to happen again.

# Wiccan: An it harm none, let S**t happen.

# Scientology: If S**t happens, see "Dianetics", p.157.

# Jehovah's Witnesses: >Knock< >Knock< S**t happens.

# Jehovah's Witnesses #2: May we have a moment of your time to show you some of our S**t?

# Jehovah's Witnesses #3: S**t has been prophesied and is imminent; only the righteous shall survive its happening.

# Moonies: Only really happy S**t happens.

# Hare Krishna: S**t happens, rama rama.

# Rastafarianism: Let's smoke this S**t!

# Zoroastrianism: S**t happens half on the time.

# Church of SubGenius: BoB S**t.

# Practical: Deal with S**t one day at a time.

# Agnostic: S**t might have happened; then again, maybe not.

# Agnostic #2: Did someone S**t?

# Agnostic #3: What is this S**t?

# Satanism: SNEPPAH TIHS.

# Atheism: What S**t?

# Atheism #2: I can't believe this S**t!

# Nihilism: No S**t.