You seem to be new to the site. Welcome. The wins will start to flow once you have a bit more practice. Meanwhile everyone will enjoy the wins you give them. I am a bit of a crackpot myself as you may notice in time.
Useful to establish the distinction between a capacity for self respect on the one hand, and narcissism on the other, and the way these different energies play out socially.
Eric Beirne, of the famous Games People Play, proposed a matrix for the way people deal with their world based on the choice to decide: I'm Okay you're Okay. This gives four "life positions" :
I'm OK you're OK
I'm OK you're not OK
I'm not OK you are OK
I'm not OK you're not OK
What is critical; is that these "life positions" are inherent in the personality and are not objective at all. Some people are just predisposed to think that others are not to be trusted.
Bowlby's Attachment Theory research over many years developed an almost identical model based on the way children emerge from their early life experiences. Some trust that their needs will be met. Some believe the opposite. Some trust that other people will like them and some expect that other people will normally dislike them and be hostile.
In this theory, if people form the fundamental belief that their needs are not going to be met, either because other people are not to be trusted or because the person does not believe themself deserving, then they will approach others on this basis consistently and it will colour (or discolour) their experiences of social life.
Both theories insist that people out there are a mixture and that we need to learn how to deal with people in a more objective manner. The first step, as you say, is learning that we ourselves have intrinsic value and are deserving of having our needs met. A second step is to appreciate that this is reciprocal and other people also have intrinsic value and deserve to have their needs met. That second step is essential to escape narcissism.
Object Relations Theory, in the psychoanalytic field, suggests that part of healthy development entails the necessary and unavoidable experience of being disappointed. Slowly, we learn that our carer (mother) is sometimes full of empathy and concern and sometimes distant and unavailable. Of course we all need the security of being looked after, but we also need the frustration of not always getting what we demand when we demand it. We have to learn that the disappointments can and will be resolved. In the process we start to learn that our needs and wishes are not the same as those of others and we must negotiate to get our needs met. In short, we learn that we are separate and individual and that so are our mother, our carers, and others generally.
Narcissism is a failure to grasp that others think and feel in their own way, differently to the way we think and feel. Most people will establish some measure of empathy, able to see that others are like ourselves but able also to see that they are not identical and do not have to be. But some people fail to achieve this outcome and their approach to social life can be poisonous. I fear that such people, narcissists, also gravitate towards the more dogmatic and intolerant aspects of politics, religion and society. I also fear that most people have a potential for narcissism which can be activated and excited by agencies of social control, not least of course the consumer marketing industry, but also those promoting bigotry in politics and religion.