The bible as a guide to life.

Many here have shown how the bible tells us not to eat diseased meat etc, but let's see how well they do with this little gem.

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0505/biblepoopquiz.html

Of course, I did look the answers up in bible.com and it turns out they are true.

So, what say all ye faithful. Why is the bible such a load of crap?

40%. I failed 🙁.

Originally posted by scottishinnz
Many here have shown how the bible tells us not to eat diseased meat etc, but let's see how well they do with this little gem.

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0505/biblepoopquiz.html

Of course, I did look the answers up in bible.com and it turns out they are true.

So, what say all ye faithful. Why is the bible such a load of crap?

I don't think the site you offered could have been more wrong in its representation of what the Bible says. When it is not blatantly misquoting the verses, it misrepresents the intent of the same.

That's a load of crap, if you ask me.

Originally posted by FreakyKBH
I don't think the site you offered could have been more wrong in its representation of what the Bible says. When it is not blatantly misquoting the verses, it misrepresents the intent of the same.

That's a load of crap, if you ask me.

I checked out a couple of their quotes, and they were accurate.

Originally posted by scottishinnz
I checked out a couple of their quotes, and they were accurate.

Scott, Scott, Scott.
First question:
"1. Which of the following delicacies did people of the Bible dine on?

A. Their own excrement.
B. Their own urine.
C. A and B.
D. None of the above."

Do you think the people who put the site together were intending for the reader to assume the "people of the Bible" is meant to be God's children? I'm gonna guess: yes, they were.

First answer:
“But Rabshakeh said, Hath my master sent me to thy master and to thee to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men that sit upon the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you” (Isaiah 36:12)?

Who is Rabshakeh? Was he there on behalf of the king of Assyria to encourage the Jews, or was he there to insult them?

Second question:
"2. Did God order His followers to make their bread with excrement?

A. Of course not. God knows that dough stuffed with doodie won’t rise.
B. Yes, but only animal crap.
C. God preferred they bake it with human feces, but when they complained, He
allowed them to substitute cow patties.
D. Use of excrement was optional."

Who was God speaking to here? All of Israel or just Ezekiel? And why would He command Ezekiel to do such a detestable act? The folks at the site want the reader to think it was business as usual, but just the opposite is true. Because Ezekiel protested to God regarding his personal efforts in maintining purity since birth, God allowed Ezekiel to use animal dung instead.

But the point was that Ezekiel was to execute several acts in the presence of the Jews, ranging from peculiar to detestable, in order to get their attention regarding their own actions before God.

Shall I continue?

Originally posted by FreakyKBH
Scott, Scott, Scott.
First question:
"1. Which of the following delicacies did people of the Bible dine on?

A. Their own excrement.
B. Their own urine.
C. A and B.
D. None of the above."

Do you think the people who put the site together were intending for the reader to assume the "people of the Bible" is meant to be God's children? I'm gonn ...[text shortened]... rder to get their attention regarding their own actions before God.

Shall I continue?

But here's the real question, "would you love your god any less is he was gay?"

Originally posted by scottishinnz
But here's the real question, "would you love your god any less is he was gay?"

Blasphemy. Do you really think the laugh is worth it?

Originally posted by FreakyKBH
Blasphemy. Do you really think the laugh is worth it?

Do you think that anyone who doesn't believe in God cares if they blaspheme?

Originally posted by XanthosNZ
Do you think that anyone who doesn't believe in God cares if they blaspheme?

Of course they care. If there was no offense, the joke would not exist. Ha-ha. Get it?

Originally posted by scottishinnz
Many here have shown how the bible tells us not to eat diseased meat etc, but let's see how well they do with this little gem.

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0505/biblepoopquiz.html

Of course, I did look the answers up in bible.com and it turns out they are true.

So, what say all ye faithful. Why is the bible such a load of crap?

Hilarious - this explains a lot!

Originally posted by FreakyKBH
Of course they care. If there was no offense, the joke would not exist. Ha-ha. Get it?

you have reacted very strongly to this saying that to imply that god is gay is blasphemous, implying that in your veiw being gay is blasphemous. I would contend that there are a very large number of gay people who wouldn't give a hoot whether you think their being gay is blasphemous or not. Also with the number of different religious beleifs out there there are any number of things that are part of one persons faith but are blasphemous to someone elses. whether or not in this case offence or mearly humor was meant I don't know. but the vast majority of blaspheming I suspect is due to the blasphemer not careing due to unbeleif. isn't it blasphemouse in some beliefs to deny the very existance of god?
(I apologiese if your issue with the statement was that god was gay and my extrapolation to everyone else is wrong, the point would still stand but that particular example wouldn't apply to you, I do know people it would apply to however.)

Originally posted by scottishinnz
Many here have shown how the bible tells us not to eat diseased meat etc, but let's see how well they do with this little gem.

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0505/biblepoopquiz.html

Of course, I did look the answers up in bible.com and it turns out they are true.

So, what say all ye faithful. Why is the bible such a load of crap?

Oh crap! , I never realised that the Bible had some really stupid bits in it. I feel so silly , my faith is now shaken to the core , infact I'm distraught and full of despair . How fragile and brittle my faith was ! How blind I was to not see these things ! What folly! What self deception! I never knew that the Bible was also steeped in Jewish superstition and wasn't completely and utterly infallible. If only I had had my eyes open I would have seen all these messy bits , been able to wrestle with the contradictions. If only I hadn't clung so desperately to those nice neat pictures of rainbows and sheep playing with lions and Jesus smiling benignly in the background. You've blown my faith out of the water! Why couldn't you just leave me in my ignorance and my naivity! You nasty man! I'm going to have to become an Atheist now , and I'll have to start thinking about stuff as well. Please educate me oh guru , how might I obtain knowledge?


NOT! (LOL)

Originally posted by knightmeister
Oh crap! , I never realised that the Bible had some really stupid bits in it. I feel so silly , my faith is now shaken to the core , infact I'm distraught and full of despair . How fragile and brittle my faith was ! How blind I was to not see these things ! What folly! What self deception! I never knew that the Bible was also steeped in Jewish supersti ...[text shortened]... f as well. Please educate me oh guru , how might I obtain knowledge?


NOT! (LOL)

Yet you live your life based upon the teachings of the bible.

You really are a smart person....NOT!!!!!!

Originally posted by googlefudge
you have reacted very strongly to this saying that to imply that god is gay is blasphemous, implying that in your veiw being gay is blasphemous. I would contend that there are a very large number of gay people who wouldn't give a hoot whether you think their being gay is blasphemous or not. Also with the number of different religious beleifs out there th ...[text shortened]... that particular example wouldn't apply to you, I do know people it would apply to however.)

Well, now that we know where you stand...
I don't give a hoot (respectively or otherwise) what 'a large number of gay people' think about the blashemous nature of that statement. Whether or not someone accepts the Bible's description of God is entirely their business. While I would hope they would respond positively to that description, ultimately the choice is theirs. That, I accept.

Did you also research these verses in context to see what the applications were, or are you just fascinated with the crap part?