1. Standard memberHand of Hecate
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    13 Nov '06 19:00
    run free?!

    Do any of you subscribe to the teachings of Bob Larson? If so, am I missing the boat or is he really a complete lunatic?

    Sunday afternoon I had the misfortune of running into a Bob Larson Ministries representative at a local Publix grocery store near my house. While waiting for some teenage cheerleaders to finish washing my truck for a High School charity this gentleman in a tan shirt accosted me with a bible. I was somewhat disorientated at first, having just been rudely pried from a vivid cheerleader fantasy.

    Fortunately, the gentlemen repeated his question and demanded to know if I had accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Saviour. I assured him that I was on a first name basis with the dieties of several religions, and, as a result, my afterlife was in good hands.

    Sadly, this gentlemen completely ignored my remark, pushed some literature into my chest and advised me that he was part of the Bob Larson Ministry. He told me that Satanism was rapidly becoming the reason that America was descending into Hell. I told him that I didn't think that Mexicans were that big of a problem. He didn't even slow down in his eagerness to advise me that gay marriage was evil and that God would punish us with wave after wave of natural disasters. I asked him if he knew whether or not sodomization was legal in Florida. I said that while I'm not into dudes, I've always liked a little brown belt action from time to time. This caused him to pause, at which time I pulled him into a hug, thanked him for saving me and scooted off to collect my truck from the hot, wet cheerleaders.

    Praise Jesus I love Publix.
  2. Territories Unknown
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    14 Nov '06 13:551 edit
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    run free?!

    Do any of you subscribe to the teachings of Bob Larson? If so, am I missing the boat or is he really a complete lunatic?

    Sunday afternoon I had the misfortune of running into a Bob Larson Ministries representative at a local Publix grocery store near my house. While waiting for some teenage cheerleaders to finish washing my truck ooted off to collect my truck from the hot, wet cheerleaders.

    Praise Jesus I love Publix.
    You have not missed the boat. Anyone who attempts to lay the blame of any nations' demise at the feet of anyone other than that nations' believers is out of touch with reality.
  3. Standard memberHand of Hecate
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    14 Nov '06 14:12
    Originally posted by FreakyKBH
    You have not missed the boat. Anyone who attempts to lay the blame of any nations' demise at the feet of anyone other than that nations' believers is out of touch with reality.
    I fail to see the attraction this and other dubious 'ministries' hold. Still, Bob Larson has, apparently, millions of followers. If you are seriously trying to evaluate your own spirituality and you happen to stumble across this and other idiots on TV, you could easily make the assumption that they represent all of Christianity. Some of the irrational rants I've tuned into are disturbing at the very least.
  4. Territories Unknown
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    14 Nov '06 14:25
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    I fail to see the attraction this and other dubious 'ministries' hold. Still, Bob Larson has, apparently, millions of followers. If you are seriously trying to evaluate your own spirituality and you happen to stumble across this and other idiots on TV, you could easily make the assumption that they represent all of Christianity. Some of the irrational rants I've tuned into are disturbing at the very least.
    Sensationalism, like sex, sells. Ol' Bob made his big splash by confronting demons, and (when it comes to the spiritually-inclined) nothing sells like supernatural evictions. His early stuff is a case study in nut-jobbery: raised to near art-form. I think if he hadn't been the fiery demon bounty hunter that he became, he would have had unlimted potential as a politician--- his mastery of human dynamics was/is so astute.

    He certainly holds true to the axiom of P.T. Barnum.

    People, in a sense, are like paper currency. While those experienced in handling a dollar may not have the expertise necessary to tell why something is fake, they nonetheless can tell the difference between valid and pretense.
  5. Standard memberHand of Hecate
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    14 Nov '06 18:05
    Originally posted by FreakyKBH
    Sensationalism, like sex, sells. Ol' Bob made his big splash by confronting demons, and (when it comes to the spiritually-inclined) nothing sells like supernatural evictions. His early stuff is a case study in nut-jobbery: raised to near art-form. I think if he hadn't been the fiery demon bounty hunter that he became, he would have had unlimted potentia ...[text shortened]... ll why something is fake, they nonetheless can tell the difference between valid and pretense.
    A friend of my wife's is the Activity Director for a local Assisted Living Facility. She's been having car trouble and either my wife or I have been ferrying her to work in the mornings. I'd never noticed before, but, no matter when I go in on any particular day, some form of evangelical program is playing on the lobby TV. I would think that this would make you want to kill yourself in very short order... perhaps this is the cause of senility and other age related mental disorders.
  6. Territories Unknown
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    14 Nov '06 18:12
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    A friend of my wife's is the Activity Director for a local Assisted Living Facility. She's been having car trouble and either my wife or I have been ferrying her to work in the mornings. I'd never noticed before, but, no matter when I go in on any particular day, some form of evangelical program is playing on the lobby TV. I would think that this w ...[text shortened]... short order... perhaps this is the cause of senility and other age related mental disorders.
    I don't know about the causal impact such indoctrination has on a persons mentality, but there does appear to be at least some type of impenetrable immaterial membrane which keeps those so indoctrinated on the other side of reality.

    But one must admire the tenacity of the religious peddlers such as BL: they keep cranking it out with machine-like precision and persistence long after the oil has been drained from the motor. One can only $peculate about the po$$ible motivation...
  7. Standard memberHand of Hecate
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    14 Nov '06 18:20
    Originally posted by FreakyKBH
    I don't know about the causal impact such indoctrination has on a persons mentality, but there does appear to be at least some type of impenetrable immaterial membrane which keeps those so indoctrinated on the other side of reality.

    But one must admire the tenacity of the religious peddlers such as BL: they keep cranking it out with machine-like precisi ...[text shortened]... e oil has been drained from the motor. One can only $peculate about the po$$ible motivation...
    I'm in the wrong line of work.
  8. London
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    14 Nov '06 18:46
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    run free?!

    Do any of you subscribe to the teachings of Bob Larson? If so, am I missing the boat or is he really a complete lunatic?

    Sunday afternoon I had the misfortune of running into a Bob Larson Ministries representative at a local Publix grocery store near my house. While waiting for some teenage cheerleaders to finish washing my truck ...[text shortened]... ooted off to collect my truck from the hot, wet cheerleaders.

    Praise Jesus I love Publix.
    Who's Bob Larson?
  9. Standard memberHand of Hecate
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    14 Nov '06 19:25
    Originally posted by lucifershammer
    Who's Bob Larson?
    Do I look like google to you?

    Bobby is a demons slayer of the first order. Without his efforts, we'd be overun by Satanic hordes.
  10. Territories Unknown
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    14 Nov '06 21:22
    Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
    Do I look like google to you?

    Bobby is a demons slayer of the first order. Without his efforts, we'd be overun by Satanic hordes.
    If not overrun, at least slimed. All that demon-punching power, and neither he or Benny can crap out a decent hairpiece. Truly, God has a sense of humor.
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