Never make your better half go shopping against his will......
This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.
After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.
Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men--he found shopping boring andpreferred to get in and get out.
Equally unfortunately, Mrs. Fenton was like most women--she loved to browse.
One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her localWal-Mart;
Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotionin our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below and are documented by our video surveillancecameras.
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away.'
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began cryingand screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department , he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, he practised his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
And last, but not least
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!'
Regards, Walmart
Originally posted by mikelom... or more likely a letter from her husband pretending to be from Walmart. 🙂 First, how would they know her name and address? Second, why would they write to her if the complaints are about him? Smart move, though. I wish I could do something like that, but who would do the shopping then? 🙁
One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her localWal-Mart;
Originally posted by Nordlys🙄
... or more likely a letter from her husband pretending to be from Walmart. 🙂 First, how would they know her name and address? Second, why would they write to her if the complaints are about him? Smart move, though. I wish I could do something like that, but who would do the shopping then? 🙁
Originally posted by mikelomLocal law enforcement didn't think it was funny that time they found me sitting in my white car, off the side of the road, mirrored sunglasses on, and pointing a blow dryer at the other cars passing by, either. 😵
Never make your better half go shopping against his will......
This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.
After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.
Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men--he found shopping boring andpreferred to get in and get out. ...[text shortened]... ery loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!'
Regards, Walmart