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Chess vs Sex

Chess vs Sex

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Ravello
The Rude©

who knows?

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I'll post this again so you can make a laugh,understand me,I'm really bored now.....😉

-a good game can last 7 hours or more and be enjoyed anytime without stopping.
-as soon as you finish a game,you're ready for another one.
-there are billions of mating positions.Always new!
-you can play chess on-line and find new partners anytime you like.
-you can't catch a disease from chess.The worst that can happen to you from sitting for too long is a sore rump.
-you don't have to chat up your opponents and send chocolate and roses before they agree to play.
-children can play chess as well.
-you can perform for a long time and still play chess well in old age.
-ugly players all get to mate.
-ugly opponents don't put you off your game.
-good players can take on hundreds of opponents at once.
-you can drink,smoke,and play chess simultaneosly.
-no one ever complains that you're moving too fast.
-in chess (not in sex) short games are highly valued.
-you don't have to kiss or hug your opponent after a game.
-in chess a quickie is often more satisfying than a long game.
-size doesn't matter.Mostplayers are satisfied with average chess boards.

😀😀😀

kirksey957
Outkast

With White Women

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Cheating still gets you banned.

Ravello
The Rude©

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Originally posted by kirksey957
Cheating still gets you banned.
But how can you cheat in sex?
Women can cheat,men not!

N
The eyes of truth

elsewhere

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Originally posted by Ravello
But how can you cheat in sex?
Women can cheat,men not!
say what now?

Ravello
The Rude©

who knows?

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Originally posted by Nyxie
say what now?
hahahaaaaa,I was sure you were going to answer to this!

No offense intented my friend, but it's well known that women can pretend to have an orgasm (can I write it without being modded?) while having sex,men surely not!

j

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funny...but i still prefer sex.

N
The eyes of truth

elsewhere

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Two things to work at your whole life and never perfect.

B
Non-Subscriber

RHP IQ

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Originally posted by Ravello
hahahaaaaa,I was sure you were going to answer to this!

No offense intented my friend, but it's well known that women can pretend to have an orgasm (can I write it without being modded?) while having sex,men surely not!
Haven't you ever faked an erection?

x

NY

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Cmon.. nothn compairs to the look on her face when you place it in door # 2..lol.. or sein her red eyed after a facial "misfire".. muhahahahaaaa...

Moldy Crow
Your Eminence

Scunthorpe

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I have to give credit where credit is due , even to you Rav - You made me chuckle , gets a rec .

PS - I heard gays fake "O's" by spitting on their partners back . Oops , did I say that out loud ? I hear the footsteps of mods , gotta go !

Fat mans revenge
Pennywise Says Hi

Up from mainstream

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A religious man can still be involved(Bishop)

-Fatty

A
D_U_N_E

Arrakis

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Originally posted by Ravello
hahahaaaaa,I was sure you were going to answer to this!

No offense intented my friend, but it's well known that women can pretend to have an orgasm (can I write it without being modded?) while having sex,men surely not!
Actually, that's not quite true. Men can pretend to have an orgasm too!
The woman can't tell if he's faking it. 😲

B
Non-Subscriber

RHP IQ

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Originally posted by arrakis
Actually, that's not quite true. Men can pretend to have an orgasm too!
The woman can't tell if he's faking it. 😲
Just so long as they don't spill the beans afterwards.

shavixmir
Lord

Sewers of Holland

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Funnily enough, I wafted through your little list and this is what I came up with:

-a good game can last 7 hours or more and be enjoyed anytime without stopping.
Good sex can last that long as well

-as soon as you finish a game,you're ready for another one.
Same with sex...surely...unless you're older than 35 or something

-there are billions of mating positions.Always new!
Read the kamasutra

-you can play chess on-line and find new partners anytime you like.
Sort of like looking at porno on the internet...

-you can't catch a disease from chess.The worst that can happen to you from sitting for too long is a sore rump.
Yes you can. There are various diseases which can be passed on by your opponent sneezing on you, coughing on you or touching his chess pieces

-you don't have to chat up your opponents and send chocolate and roses before they agree to play.
I do if I want to actually win a bloody game

-children can play chess as well.
I remember playing Dr. and nurses when I was 7...and believe me....there were no stethoscopes involved.

-you can perform for a long time and still play chess well in old age.
I've heard that the older you get, the longer it takes...

-ugly players all get to mate.
There are millions of ugly people, my, I'd even go as far as to say FUGLY people, who get laid more often than I do. Yes, it pisses me off, but it does prove that ugly people shag.

-ugly opponents don't put you off your game.
vodka my friend. 1/2 liter of vodka and she could look like her doctor was a vet and have legs that could kickstart a jumbo jet, and you wouldn't care less.

-good players can take on hundreds of opponents at once.
You don't have to be good at sex to do this. Just bloody lucky. Look at me...I'm being asked to film hot lesbo action.

-you can drink,smoke,and play chess simultaneosly.
I can drink smoke, play chess, have sex and read playboy at the same time. No problemo.

-no one ever complains that you're moving too fast.
Yes, but a lot of people complain that you move too slow...and that doesn't happen during sex

-in chess (not in sex) short games are highly valued.
Never underestimate a quicky! There's nothing quite like a fast shag to make one happy. Especially in strange places.

-you don't have to kiss or hug your opponent after a game.
I believe they do in Russia

-in chess a quickie is often more satisfying than a long game.
Depends what the woman looks like. As I've stated before, there is a time for quickies and it should be used

-size doesn't matter.Mostplayers are satisfied with average chess boards.
Size doesn't matter in sex either. It's motion that counts....and multi-tasking

And so...
I see no real difference between sex and playing chess at all.
Actually, I get quite horny just looking at my queen.

x

NY

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so true...

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