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Dinner and a Show.

Dinner and a Show.

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I took a late lunch today, hit Wendy's for a quick burger and decided to park my truck under a tree and chill out for awhile. These two teenagers on a bicycle come whipping down the hill and blew past me. One is sitting in front pedaling for all he's worth and the other is standing on these tubes that stick out from either side of the rear wheel, holding onto his buddies shoulders and trying not to fall off.

Suddenly the bike does a little zig zag and the kid in the back slipped off the supports, and hammered his crotch into the rear wheel. This was bad enough, but the forward momentum of the spinning wheel dragged his balls into the rear brakes and butchered them. This flipped him backwards and spun the bike out of control. The rest of the wreck was a flurry of limbs, wheels, gravel and chrome as both the riders and the bike bit the dust savagely.

The guy on the back smashed the hell out of his nuts and had to be taken away in an ambulance. Not a bad show for $4.85.

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
These too teenagers .
😛

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
I took a late lunch today, hit Wendy's for a quick burger and decided to park my truck under a tree and chill out for awhile. These too teenagers on a bicycle come whipping down the hill and blew past me. One is sitting in front peddling for all he's worth and the other is standing on these tubes that stick out from either side of the rear wheel, ho ...[text shortened]... the hell out of his nuts and had to be taken away in an ambulance. Not a bad show for $4.85.
Interesting that you brought this up...

Yesterday as I was riding my bike to the store, I was marveling at all the stupid stuff I used to do on my bike as a kid. It's a wonder my plump, juicy, he-berries are still intact.

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
I took a late lunch today, hit Wendy's for a quick burger and decided to park my truck under a tree and chill out for awhile. These too teenagers on a bicycle come whipping down the hill and blew past me. One is sitting in front peddling for all he's worth and the other is standing on these tubes that stick out from either side of the rear wheel, ho ...[text shortened]... the hell out of his nuts and had to be taken away in an ambulance. Not a bad show for $4.85.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHahahahahahahaaaa!!!!! God that was funny, I wish I'd been there...please don't tell me this was a lie, just please don't.

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Originally posted by Natsia
Thank you Natsia, you're a veritable saint of all things literary.

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Originally posted by rbmorris
Interesting that you brought this up...

Yesterday as I was riding my bike to the store, I was marveling at all the stupid stuff I used to do on my bike as a kid. It's a wonder my plump, juicy, he-berries are still intact.
That's funny.

My kids are at that fine age where they love to do amazing stunts on their bikes. They made a bunch of ramps in the dirt lot over the summer, called it "dirt camp".

It is hilarious what kids will think of!

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
I took a late lunch today, hit Wendy's for a quick burger and decided to park my truck under a tree and chill out for awhile. These two teenagers on a bicycle come whipping down the hill and blew past me. One is sitting in front peddling for all he's worth and the other is standing on these tubes that stick out from either side of the rear wheel, ho ...[text shortened]... the hell out of his nuts and had to be taken away in an ambulance. Not a bad show for $4.85.
pedaling, not "peddling", and try to stay in the same tense throughout.

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Originally posted by rbmorris

"he-berries"
that made me chuckle, not heard that before 😀😛

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Originally posted by PBE6
HAHAHAHAHAHAHahahahahahahaaaa!!!!! God that was funny, I wish I'd been there...please don't tell me this was a lie, just please don't.
I think the worst thing I ever did on a bike, with the exception of breaking an arm falling of it, was to hit a HUGE pile of dog poo doing about Mach 5. The rooster tail of poo was traumatic. {shudder}

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Originally posted by ChronicLeaky
pedaling, not "peddling", and try to stay in the same tense throughout.
Get stuffed you humorless troll. You're not nearly good enough looking to be questioning my writing.

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I used to only use my back brakes. Eventually they wore out.

One day my friends and I decided to roll down this hill. At the end of the hill is a two foot cliff leading down to the road. We were going to jump over it.

Right at the brink, I got scared and hit both brakes hard. The front brake grabbed the rim but instead of just stopping the entire bike rotated around the front axle, dumping me on my head in the road kind of like an upended wheelbarrow. It hurt.

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Originally posted by Hand of Hecate
I took a late lunch today, hit Wendy's for a quick burger and decided to park my truck under a tree and chill out for awhile. These two teenagers on a bicycle come whipping down the hill and blew past me. One is sitting in front pedaling for all he's worth and the other is standing on these tubes that stick out from either side of the rear wheel, ho ...[text shortened]... the hell out of his nuts and had to be taken away in an ambulance. Not a bad show for $4.85.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! I CANT BREATHE!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!