Favourite Monty Python Quotes

I am Arthur, your King.

"Who made you King?"

I was given the sword Excaibur by the Lady of The Lake.

"What? You can't wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you!"

- I’ll bet you’re gay!?
- No, I’m not...!"

Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

"You don't frighten us, English pig dogs. Go and boil your bottoms, you sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you, so-called "Arthur King," you and all your silly English K-nig-hts. "

"Is it a boy or a girl"

"I think it's a bit early to start imposing roles, don't you ?"

How do we tell if she's made of wood ?

Build a bridge out of er.

"All right, but apart from the sanitation, medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh water system and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?"

"Look, if I argue with you I must take a contrary position."

"Well, it's not just saying 'No it isn't'!"

"Yes it is!"

"He's pining for the fjords."

"F*** Off"

"How should we F*** off oh lord?"

"Silence! What is all this insolence? You will find yourself in gladiator school vewy quickly with wotten behaviour like that. "

"I'm not the Messiah"

"I'd say you are, and i know, i've followed a few"

I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.

"Centurian..why do they titter so?"

"Are you a poofda?"

I'll have the lot.